HairSnip.com

Note from the author: This story is long. If you don't like long stories and you send emails back marked tl;dr, you probably won't like this story. Just sayin'.

I have the most wonderful husband in the world.

Ted's a great guy. Most people, when I say he's an engineer think: cold fish, dull, no sense of humor or style and a slide rule sticking out of his pocket protector.

Nothing could be further from the truth (except for the pocket protector).

He's funny, smart, creative, great company and amazing in bed. He made a bunch of money out of a start-up company so he retired at 50, but he's not moping around the house all day in a grungy cardigan. When he's not taking me off for fun vacations, he's mentoring students at local high schools and colleges to get them turned on to engineering. And in his spare time he's working on solutions to climate change.

Sounds perfect, right?

Until you try to shop for him.

He's got plenty of hobbies, but really anything he needs for them he'll just buy for himself. He's quite capable of buying his own clothes, and he doesn't need all that many ties.

The only thing I know he really wants is something I can't give him.

In another blow to the popular image of the dull engineer, Ted has a sexual fantasy. It isn't about monster titties or girl on girl, Ted has a thing about women with really short hair and cutting women's hair really short.

Hey, don't judge him! We all have our funny little ways.

When I first found out about it, I tried to enter into his enthusiasm. He showed me all sorts of pictures and pointed out the ones he thought would look hot on me.

No. I mean, I love him and I really do want him to be happy, but I just couldn't do that.

For a while we tried to work out a compromise and I'd let him trim my hair, but I could tell that doing that just frustrated him to want more. So, to both of our relief, we gave that up and I went back to having my hair done at the salon.

To his credit, Ted really did understand that I couldn't do that for him and he never tried to talk me into it. We have a sort of unspoken agreement - I know he looks at pictures on websites and maybe even fantasizes on chat rooms, but I also know he'd never do anything to jeopardize our marriage.

It always just seemed like one of those things that you want but can never have.

Until I went looking for clowns on Craigslist.

Speaking for myself, I have no need or desire for clowns. But my daughter, Meghan, was overbooked as usual, and complaining that she didn't have time to find an entertainer for my oldest granddaughter, Ariel's, birthday. I thought that was a terrible idea and would probably terrify the children.

So, rather than just searching for clowns, I was paging through the listings looking for something that would be entertaining and not traumatic when I saw it:

Have You Always Wanted to Cut a Woman's Hair?

Well, me personally, no, but I knew someone who did.

I clicked on the link.

I'm looking for someone to cut off my long, blond hair for me. You can choose the style and where and who does the cutting.

No sex or nudity, sorry.

It had to be a joke. Or maybe a prostitute. Maybe some sort of blackmail scam.

I backed out of the listing and resolutely continued to look for entertainers for children's parties.

Except, she said no sex or nudity, so she couldn't be a prostitute and how could you blackmail someone about something that happens in hairdressers' salons ever day?

Anyway, my yahoo email address didn't give away my real name, so there wasn't any harm in just finding out a little more. I paged back to her listing.

All of a sudden, I felt the apprehension when you see the perfect item on ebay but the bidding was almost over. What if I'd waited too long and someone else got her? I knew from Ted that he wasn't the only man who had this fetish. What if her email was swamped with offers?

I clicked on her email link.

What do you say in a circumstance like that? I decided that maybe if I told her a little about me and Ted, then she'd know I really just was looking for the haircut.

I told her my husband had always been fascinated with short hair and hair cutting and I wasn't. He was a great guy and I wanted to give him the best birthday present ever, and, I thought this would be it for him.

Oh, and even though she hadn't mentioned payment, I said I'd be happy to compensate her. Maybe that would encourage her to pick us.

I hit send and then tried to settle back and wait.

This wasn't my fetish, but I was as jumpy as a teenage boy who thinks this might be the night he finally gets laid.

I opened my in-box as a tab in my browser and tried to keep occupied with other stuff. An hour passed. And then another half hour.

I found some possibles for the entertainment and forwarded the links to Meghan. I was tired of sitting at my computer desk and decided that it was a case of the watched pot that resolutely refuses to boil.

I put my computer on standby (Ted had his own, so I knew he wouldn't see my email or the craigslist listing) and went downstairs.

Ted came in a bit later, we had dinner and what should have been a relaxing evening, until Ted asked me why I kept jumping up to go to my study.

"Oh, well, I'm . . . bidding on something on ebay and I want to see if I got it."

"Don't they have fixed times the auctions end?"

"Well, yes, but I'm watching to see how I'm doing."

He laughed. "I understand, it's the thrill of the hunt."

"Exactly."

"Anything you want to tell me about?"

"No, if I get it, I want it to be a surprise."

"Ok. You want some ice cream?"

"Always."

Finally, a little after 10:00, when I was just starting to think I should put my computer to bed for the night, there was an email from an address I didn't know.

Hi Elaine,

How did she know my name? I paged down to where she'd quoted my email. Oh, right, I'd signed it, the way I always do. Fortunately just my first name.

Sorry for being so late getting back to you. I was out running errands all day and then when I got in my inbox was overflowing.

Oh, no, had I responded too late?

I was particularly interested in your response, 1. 'cause I think it would be fun to be someone's birthday present and 2. I figure with the guy's wife there it's a lot clearer that I really do mean no sex. (Not that I'm against sex, just not with someone I met on craigslist. )

In order to decide whether this is something we both want to do, I think it'd be best if we met to talk about it a little more, find out more about each other. Maybe at a coffee house somewhere? I live in the city, but I have a car, so the suburbs work, too.

My schedule's pretty flexible, so if you're interested in meeting up, what would work for you?

Mary.

Ted wasn't kidding. I was caught up in the thrill of the hunt. I looked up at my calendar. There wasn't anything I couldn't reschedule for the next week. Tomorrow was Friday, she probably couldn't meet during the work week. I didn't have anything over the weekend. Next weekend was open, too, but that was a long weekend and maybe she had plans.

I started typing:

Hi Mary,

Thanks for your reply. I would be interested in meeting. There's a nice coffee shop that should be convenient for both of us.

(I included a weblink so she could see the directions).

My schedule's pretty flexible too. I could be there any time Saturday, or Sunday mid-afternoon. I could do tomorrow, too, but that's probably too short notice for you.

Let me know if the place is ok and when you'd like to meet.

I'm looking forward to meeting you.

Elaine

I waited until 10:30, but there was no reply, so I went to bed.

"How was your auction?"

"I'm in the lead."

Fond smile: "Good, I hope you get it."

Equally fond smile: "Me too."

Ted was up and out early Friday morning - some meetings at the local college. He wouldn't be in until evening.

I poured myself a cup of coffee and went to check my email.

Meghan thanked me for the links, but had she mentioned that what she wanted was 'clowns'? I'd sent her everything but clowns.

Yes, well that was the point really. I made a note to make a list of clowns, and psychotherapists who could treat my granddaughter's resultant PTSD.

Sales flyers from every clothing store that had my email address, but no, wait, yes.

Hey Elaine,

Sorry I missed you last night. I got caught up in a movie.

Truthfully, if you can still swing it, today would work best for me. If we decide this is a go, then I can tell the other guys, 'sorry, better luck next time'. I swear one guy's emailed me 4 times already! Somebody really needs to tell him that desperation is not attractive. It also makes me wonder if I could get rid of him, afterwards.

The place you suggested is fine and I could do anytime that works for you, but 2:00 ish would be great.

Let me know. If not, pick a time Saturday.

Mary

Excellent!

Hi Mary,

I'll meet you there at 2:00 this afternoon. How will I recognize you?

Elaine

She must have a really fast connection. I'd barely hit send when I got:

Long blond hair. I'll be taking advantage of their free wifi on my cute, child-sized laptop.

M.

I couldn't believe I was doing this.

I'd almost given up when I was getting ready to go and I realized that I had no idea what you wear to a meeting where you're trying to convince someone to let your husband cut off a lot of her hair.

But, now I was here.

Walking through the parking lot, I tried to guess which car was hers - if she was even going to show up. Oh, there it was. The one held together by rust and the alternative life-style bumper stickers. I hoped she didn't have too many piercings. Ted didn't really like piercings. Well, for a pair of earrings sure, just not a dozen.

I walked in, wondering how I could back out if she really wasn't right.

A few women, two blondes. Oh, there she was, she had one of those little laptops for the third world. Ted had bought one to support the project, but he couldn't type on the keyboard, so he'd given it to a local school. She was sitting in visual range of the counter help but far enough away that our conversation wouldn't be overheard.

No weird piercings or tattoos that I could see. Thank goodness!

She looked up and saw me hesitating at the door.

Pleasant smile: "Elaine? Hi I'm Mary."

As she stood up, I had a feeling of disappointment. Her hair was up in a high ponytail, but it only came down a little past her shoulders. I mean, it wasn't short, but . . .

Mary must have identified the look on my face, because instead of reaching out to shake my hand, she reached up to the back of her own head.

Pulling her hand away from her head, she gave her head a quick shake and quarter-turned so I could see her back. Her hair hadn't been in a pony-tail; it had been partially put up in a bun. Now that it was loose it came down below bra-strap level

But now I didn't believe that she would really cut it. Unlike most natural blondes, her hair was thick and wavy. It looked fantastic with her tan skin and bright blue eyes. I knew Ted would love to cut that hair, but what were the odds? Maybe this was just some sort of elaborate put-on.

Mary transferred the hair comb to her left hand and offered me her right to shake. That done, she pointed to the cup of tea and a cookie next to her plate and said "do you want anything?"

I went and got a coffee for myself wondering how I could possibly convince her to go through with what she'd offered.

As I sat down, still trying to devise a strategy, Mary smiled at me and said: "I don't read minds, but I know what you're thinking."

I looked at her puzzled, and she handed me two photographs.

One was of her her with a longish crewcut and then with a flattop, In the pictures, her hair didn't have much contrast with her light skin. She wasn't tan in the pictures. With the summer tan she had now it would show up better.

I'd never thought that short hair was flattering on most of the girls in the pictures Ted looked at, but looking at it on someone so normal looking, and so pretty, well I could see how it could be an attractive look.

She smiled again. "I knew you had to be thinking that I'd chicken out or something, so I figured it would save time if I started with the pictures, so you'd know I've already done this before."

"I did wonder. You have such beautiful hair, and then you said you'd be okay with cutting it short, but. . ." I looked back down at the pictures, she obviously was okay with cutting it really short.

"Yeah, I know.

"You said your husband's into it, so you know there are some people who find short hair sexy on women or get turned on by the cutting. I'm one of the comparatively rare women who's both.

"I just plain like having my hair short. But, I also really like the experience of having someone cut it off. The last time I went ultra-short I was in graduate school. I was lucky and I had a boyfriend who was really into it. He cut it for me and then experimented with all sorts of different short styles. He had a barber do the flattop, though. It's harder to do than you'd think.

"Anyway, it did amazing things for our sex life, but eventually we decided we weren't really suited in other ways. We broke up, but we're still good friends.

"I graduated and got a serious job at a serious company. I could have gotten away with having my hair a lot shorter than it is, but I figured, that if I couldn't have it really short, I might as well spend the time growing it long. Then I'd have something to cut off again."

She took a sip of her tea. I realized that I'd been so fascinated that I hadn't touched my coffee I added a couple of sweeteners and stirred it as she continued.

"Then, I got offered my dream job - it's in the back of beyond and the only dress code is 'practical'. When they called me in to offer me the job, they looked at me and said something like, 'you might find it's more comfortable with shorter hair.' I said, 'so a crewcut would be good?' joking, you know.

"The recruiter looked at me and said, 'well, seriously, that would be ideal. But as short as you're comfortable with.' I've already left the serious job, so I can do whatever I want. So, next stop craigslist."

"You said that it was a sex thing with your boyfriend, but in your ad you said, 'no sex.' I guessI don't understand what it is you're looking for."

"The thing is, if I were in a relationship with a guy who was into it, I'd be at the beauty supply place right now buying scissors and clippers and whatever other toys he wanted to play with.

"But I'm not.

"So, the next best thing is, even without it being a sex thing, I still really enjoy the process of having my hair cut. I could go in to a barber or I could get clippers and just buzz it off myself. But that isn't the same as having someone else decide how much and when and where. I guess it's kind of a control thing, in reverse.

"Also, since one way or another it's coming off, I did figure why mess up my bathroom floor when there are lots of guys for whom it would be a major thrill?

"But anyway, to answer your question. I'm not looking for sex with the person who cuts my hair, and if that's what you were thinking, then we're not running on parallel tracks."

"No! I'm definitely not looking to get Ted a hooker for his birthday." I blushed as I said that, I didn't mean to imply that she. . .

Mary obviously understood what I meant. "So, when is his birthday?"

"In about 6 months."

Now Mary was the one who looked disappointed. "Oh. . . . It's just that I'm scheduled to leave in a little over a month. So, that's not really going to work." She made a little, apologetic grimace.

"Oh, no I mean last birthday!"

"Okay?"

"Sorry, that wasn't clear. Ted turned 50 on his last birthday. He was involved in a lot of stuff, leaving his old company and getting some new projects set up. I told him we'd schedule a big party for him when we had more time. Somehow, we've never gotten around to it. But now, I could give him the best birthday evah! As the kids say."

She laughed at my would be rad-speak. But that made me think of something: "Fifty's not too old, is it? I mean, he's not a dirty old man or anything."

She shook her head, "Hey, fifty's the new forty. Anyway, you're the one who's going to be benefiting from any sexual stimulus he gets from this, not me."

"You'd be okay with me being there?"

"I'd prefer you to be there. One, it'll make me feel a little more confident about the whole situation and, two, the last thing I want to do is add a seed of doubt in your marriage with you wondering whether anything really happened. If you're there, you'll know."

I hadn't even thought of that.

"You said you're leaving in a month. When did you want to do this?"

"I'd prefer sooner rather than later. That way if the person who does it decides he wants to shave my head, I have a chance to grow out a bit of sun protection before I leave."

"You'd really let him do that? Shave your head?"

"Well, with an electric razor or a safety razor, yes. If he's got a thing for an old-fashioned blade shave, then we'd have to go to a barber. Haircutting fine, scalp nicking, not so great."

"But, I mean, you'd let someone shave you bald?"

"Truthfully, that's not one of my turn-ons. And I doubt it would look good on me - so I've never tried it.

"But, at the lengths we're talking about, hair grows fast. In a couple of weeks, I'd have a tight crewcut. In a month, it'd be about a half inch. If that's something he'd really want to do, I'm easy going."

She picked up her tea and settled back into her chair. I got the feeling the ball was in my court.

I took my time. I didn't want to blow this for Ted. I sat back and sipped my coffee. I knew I should negotiate or bargain, but that didn't feel right

"Mary, I really want to make this happen for Ted. I can't tell you what a great guy he is, and I know this would make him so happy.

"Tell me what I can offer you to make this happen."

She laughed, she had an easy laugh. "Wow, way to play it cagey.

"What I'm looking from out of this is a fun, safe time.

"I like you and I'm guessing that a man you're married to is probably someone I'd like - in a non-sexual way - as well. If we can figure out a scenario that sounds fun, and safe, I'm in.

"You mentioned money in your email. I'm not in this for the money. That said, dream jobs never seem to pay all that well. If at the end, you, not Ted, feel like giving me a small gift to help with my expenses, well I'd probably accept it graciously.

"So, what would be fun for you?'

"Well, I like anticipation and also not knowing what was going to happen next. Is the first cut going to be just a trim, or does he get out the clippers? That sort of thing.

"Also, I really enjoy showing off my look, especially when it's new. I kind of like the stares. And I know from some of the boards I read, that a lot of guys really like the idea of walking around in public with a hot, " she made a little, self-deprecating face, but, hair or no hair I bet she was hot, "short haired chick. So, maybe we could go someplace together, a mall, or out to lunch. . .

"Were you planning on having this a surprise for Ted?"

"Yes, definitely."

"Then maybe what we could do would be meet up somewhere the night before, you'd introduce me, we'd discuss the ground rules: no sex, no violence, if I start to feel uneasy I'm walking out the door. Then let him take that night to figure out what he wants to do, and enjoy the anticipation. Then he could get started when I come over the next day."

"You'd be willing to stretch it out over more than one day?"

"Oh, yeah, I like to drag it out as much as I can."

"You said you'd come over. Were you thinking you'd do it at our house?"

"That's a possibility. My apartment is a little studio with almost no natural light, so that wouldn't be so great. But if your place would be weird, we could figure out someplace else. Maybe you could tell him you wanted to take him for a nice get away to the beach for the weekend. When you get there, I'll be checked into the same hotel."

She looked thoughtful, "Of course the housekeeping staff might not be so thrilled about vacuuming up all that hair, but hey, leave 'em a big tip and it's all good."

"Doing it at our house wouldn't actually work that well, either. None of our kids live there, but they do tend to drop in un-announced when we're home. . ."

"You think embarrassment might ensue if they walked into the basement and found Dad cutting off a strange woman's hair?"

"Oooh yeah! I'm not sure they entirely believe that we actually produced them through sex. I think a hint of anything not pure vanilla. . . "

"Definitely not your house then. I'm too old to be running and hiding every time a car door slams."

"That made me think of something, but I'm not sure you'd consider it safe."

She nodded at me to go on.

"We have a cabin, up in the woods, by the lake. Well we call it a cabin, but it's nice, it's a house, just, you know, low key. Maybe we could go up there for a couple of days. It's quiet and very private and there's a big open room that has great light and hardwood floors for easy sweeping. It's not too far from town, so if you wanted to, we could definitely go out and let you peacock around.

"But, the downside is, it is quiet and private and I'm not sure I'd want my daughter going off alone there with strangers she'd just met. . . " I trailed off doubtfully.

"That's a possibility."

"But Mary, really, I'm not sure that is a good idea. I know you'd be safe, but you shouldn't trust me, just 'cause you think I'm ok."

"Oh, I don't.

"I mean I do think you're ok. But you're right, you could just be saying that so I'd think, 'see, she wouldn't say that if she meant any harm.' On the other hand, I think if you are ok, that might work really well.

"Does your license have your social security number on it?"

"I think I just got whiplash."

"Sorry, what I meant is, I do have a way of checking whether you and Ted are known ax-murderers. I have a friend who's in law-enforcement. I told him I was planning on finding someone, probably a guy, and letting him experience a fantasy with my hair and a pair of scissors.

"Said friend thought that was a really bad idea. But, knowing that's rarely stopped me before, he said if I could get some ID from the person in advance, he could discreetly check the person out. Also, if worse came to worse and I disappeared, he'd know where to start digging.

"Law enforcement makes people very cynical, sad really.

"So, if your license doesn't have your social security number on it, you could, if you wanted to, let me make a photocopy of it, he does a run down on you and Ted on the QT (and it would be QT, 'cause he's not supposed to do it) and if you're not on any of the secret bad guys lists, we have a fun weekend in the woods."

Suddenly, I felt unsafe. No, my license didn't have my social security number on it, but, the idea of someone I'd met on craigslist having personal information on me. . .

Mary once again settled back in her chair.

"It's not that I don't trust you. . ."

"I do understand, it's kind of a delicate dance. We can think of something else."

No, now that I had it in my mind, it would be perfect and really she was taking much more risk than we were.

I reached into my purse and pulled out my wallet. I put my license on the table between us. "There's a Kinkos a couple of doors down."

She nodded but made no attempt to pick it up. "Had you given any thought to when?"

"Could you do next weekend? Drive up on Friday, stay Friday night, play it by ear from there."

"Yeah."

"Would that give you enough time?" I looked down at my license.

"Plenty of time. Oh, crap, speaking of time, it's already after 4:00, you're going to hit all the traffic coming out of the city."

"You're not?

"Nobody's driving into the city on a Friday afternoon in the summer. Once I hit the highway, it's gonna be me and a couple of guys who work in restaurants."

She was probably right about that. "Shall we do the rest of the planning by email?

"That would be good."

We bused our table and walked together to the Kinkos. I handed her the license so she could make the copy. She surprised me by reaching into her own wallet and making a copy of her license which she handed to me.

We walked back to the coffee shop parking lot. Her car was the sensible Honda sedan with no bumper stickers at all. You just never can tell.

Mary was right and the traffic was brutal on my drive home.

Ted was home ahead of me. We didn't monitor each others' movements, except to know if the other one would be out for meals or stuff like that, so he accepted without comment my explanation that I'd been having coffee with an old friend. In a way, it felt like that was the truth.

After dinner, Ted, smacked me playfully on the butt and said, "I know you're dying to check out your auction. You head up, I have a date with the bad science on the Sci-Fi channel."

It's true, never watch scifi with an engineer with an interest in physics. It's just fortunate the characters on the shows can't shout back.

I proceeded sedately up the stairs. Checked my email, yes Meghan was happy with the list of clowns and politely told me that I'd mistakenly included a list of psychotherapists that I must have pulled for someone else. She'd soon learn.

Wait, when was the birthday party? Oh, not for another month. For modern birthday parties I guess planning it less than 6 months in advance counted as spur of the moment.

Oh, and how lovely, an email from my old friend, Mary.

She'd gotten in fine, minimal traffic. Was really excited about this. Suggested if I really wanted to keep it a secret from Ted that I shouldn't start casually pumping him about what he'd like to do if he ever did get a chance to cut a woman's hair short.

I remembered that I'd almost asked him as I was heading upstairs if he didn't think Samantha Carter would look better with shorter hair, and decided Mary was right. I was just going to need to put a padlock on my lips for the next week if I didn't want to spill it all.

I didn't think we'd fail her background check, but her cop friend might talk her out of it anyway. Better to not get Ted's hopes up until her car was parked by the woodpile at the cabin.

I looked back at her email. She continued that if I felt that I needed to talk about it or explode, she was always there as a release valve. She included her home and cell numbers at the bottom.

I replied in kind and supplied her with my numbers as well.

I went back downstairs and enjoyed watching Ted explain to Ronon that C-4 doesn't really work like that.

Do you remember that movie, Big, with Tom Hanks? The teaser line was something like, 'did you ever have a really big secret?' That was just exactly what I felt like. I was lucky that the kids at the college were working on a major engineering project for some competition. Otherwise, I think Ted would have begun to wonder if I was having an affair.

I had a bad moment when I remembered that the competition was over this coming long weekend, until I also remembered that Ted had made an executive decision not to go with the team. He wanted them to feel like it was all their own work.

I casually checked with him when they would be leaving. Friday morning, it'd be a long drive with a trailer in tow.

Good to know.

On Wednesday, Mary confirmed that as far as the police were concerned we were nice, respectable people who didn't hide young women's bodies in the woods. So, we were on.

When Ted got in, I told him that since he'd been spending so much time in a smelly, badly ventilated workshop, I wanted to spend the long weekend at the cabin.

He acceded to my wishes, we always try to accommodate anything that the other person particularly wants to do, but I could tell it wasn't really what he wanted to do. He did cheer up when I reminded him that the satellite dish for the TV would also give him nearly as good internet access as he had at home.

Not that I thought he was going to be spending much time with his laptop.

When he headed out Thursday morning, I called Mary to confirm we were a go. I emailed her directions and a gps fix that she could put in her car navigation system - street addresses didn't mean much up by the lake.

I'd already arranged with Ted that I'd head up to the lake early. I'd do the shopping for the weekend up there, air out the rooms, basically get things ready for a relaxing weekend.

Ted would follow me in his car after he'd helped the team stabilize and strap everything down for transport.

Friday morning, I packed for us both, making sure we had a variety of clothes from very casual to suitable for dinner in a nice restaurant.

Soon, I was letting myself into the cabin. I opened the windows to let it air out, put my groceries away, and was working on hanging up our clothes in the master bedroom when I heard a car pulling up the driveway.

Sensible, blue Honda, with a very unsensible blond driver.

I went out to meet Mary at the car. We hugged. I was beginning to feel like she was an old friend. I helped her drag her suitcase in. For a woman who was heading towards the back of beyond in a month, she sure didn't have a minimalist approach to packing.

When I mentioned that, she said, "it's not that I'm planning on moving in, it's just that I wanted to have a lot of flexibility for whatever you and Ted wanted to do. I've got a couple of different colored dinner dresses, a sundress that looks amazing with a flattop. Various degrees of casual slacks to jeans. I'm prepared.

"Like a boyscout, but with breasts."

I opened the closet and showed her the attached bathroom. As she hung up her clothes, I could see that that was true. I wasn't sure how some of the more feminine outfits would really look with an unfeminine haircut, but this was her area of expertise not mine.

Next I heard the sound of Ted's car coming up the driveway. Wouldn't he be surprised?

As we walked to the living room, Mary smoothed her long hair. It occurred to me that I hadn't really thought how to explain this to Ted. Oh well, we've never had any problems communicating. I'd just tell him.

"Hi Ted, come into the living room, there's someone I'd like you to meet."

Ted came in with his social face on. He'd have seen the Honda, so he knew we had company even before I called him.

"Ted, I'd like you to meet Mary, she's your birthday present."

"Well, not all of me, just my hair," Mary clarified.

"Is this some sort of joke?" If so, Ted seemed to think it wasn't funny.

"No, it's quite simple, I met Mary on the internet. She was looking for someone to cut her hair short. I told her I knew you'd like to do it, so we agreed she'd come up here this weekend and let you cut it. She says you can cut it as short as you want, but no sex or nudity. Happy Birthday!"

"Elaine, have you lost your mind? You invite a total stranger into our house because she says she'll let me cut her hair? It's a scam, we turn our backs and she's out of the house with everything she can carry."

"Ted, it's not a scam, really. We've talked about this, she's into haircutting, too. She had her hair really short before."

"I cannot even believe this."

"Ted, please, let's just sit down and talk about this."

"I don't see anything to talk about."

"Perhaps, I could help explain the situation,. . . " Mary put in.

"I don't need explanations from a con artist, thank you!"

 I was stunned. Ted was hardly even rude and this was downright surly. I didn't know whether to apologize to Mary or take him to task, when Mary temporarily took the matter out of my hands.

"You know, Elaine, my throat is getting a little dry. Could I have that glass of water now?"

I wasn't sure I wanted to leave, but Mary seemed unconcerned, and then she gave me the subtlest chin jerk to suggest she really did want me to leave for a minute.

I headed towards the kitchen.

I may have paused, just for a minute, outside the living room door - a painting was sadly crooked.

"Ok, Ted, I do get it. You don't think I'm really going to go ahead with this. You think at the last minute I'll be out the door, laughing at you. I know that's not true, but unless you want to go get the kitchen shears right now and have at it, there's no way you can know it.

"But, you should know this. Elaine went to a lot of trouble to set this up for you. She was really excited at the thought of being able to give you the best birthday present she could imagine. Now she's feeling really hurt and upset. And, whatever you think about me, she doesn't deserve that.

"So, how 'bout we shelve this for now. We have a couple of drinks, a lovely dinner. We don't talk about hair, or any of that. Then, in the morning, we discuss this. If you're feeling more confident in me then, we go ahead. If not, you tell Elaine it was a lovely, thoughtful gesture, but you'd just feel weird about it. I thank you both for a lovely evening and I drive home."

"With all our silverware in your car."

"Elaine mentioned that the security system would be triggered if anyone was wandering around at night, so I should bring anything I might want during the night up with me. I was thinking maybe a bottle of soda, not the contents of Elaine's jewelry box.

"That said, if you want, I can leave now."

"No, you're Elaine's guest, of course you're welcome." The tone was grumpy, but Mary chose to take him at his word.

Not exactly a love feast, but it would do. I went to get the glass of water.

When I came back in, Mary was sitting on the couch, flipping through a coffee table book.

"Oh, thank you. I'll have to remember to take my anti-histamines tonight."

"Do you have bad allergies?" Even if Ted was not going to be helpful, I wasn't going to let the side down.

Mary and I made casual chit-chat about allergies and the advantages and disadvantages of being out in the forest.

Before too long, Ted recovered himself enough to offer us drinks, and ask whether we'd like him to get us some snacks. Mary deferred to me, saying that she was pretty hungry, but she didn't want to spoil her appetite.

I was pretty hungry, too and I suspected that was at least part of the reason for Ted's bad mood so I suggested he get started grilling the steaks. He hadn't set up the outdoor grill yet, but more often than not we just used the grill on the range, anyway.

Mary asked if there was anything she could do, so I put her to work on the salad while I checked the potatoes and then set the table.

Soon we were all sitting at the porch table, enjoying a perfect summer dinner. I wasn't sure if it was appropriate to ask, but I didn't know what else we should talk about, so I asked Mary about her new job. It turned out that it was a scientific research project. At first, Ted seemed a little dismissive, but the more Mary talked about what she would be doing, and as her patent enthusiasm for her work showed through, he warmed up a bit.

He was positively joking with her when he said "you're not going to be comfortable in that climate with all that hair." I could see him stop himself suddenly and assess what he'd just said.

Mary agreed, matter of factly, "No in fact, when I got the job they strongly advised me to chop it as short as I was willing to go."

Mary and I turned the conversation to other topics, but I could see that Ted was suddenly very thoughtful.

After dinner, I asked Mary what she'd like to do. Again, she said she'd be delighted with whatever we wanted to do. Then she said, "but, my terrible, guilty secret is that I usually watch the Sci-Fi channel on Friday nights. It's true, I have no social life."

At that point, I knew Mary had gone a long way towards winning Ted over.

I had no objection to a quiet evening in front of the TV and I think Ted was happy to have something to do that didn't require him to make conversation. Stargate was an episode that they both knew pretty well, so they had fun skewering the bad science.

By Stargate Atlantis, Ted had quieted down. I was wondering what he was thinking when he turned to Mary and asked, "how short were you thinking of going?"

"That's up to you. I told Elaine that you could do anything up to a shave with an electric razor or a safety razor. But if you wanted me to have a real blade shave we'd have to find a barber."

"You want me to shave your head?!?!"

"Want? Not so much. It's never been one of my things, and honestly, I don't think it looks all that great on most women.

"On the other hand, it's your belated birthday, and in a month I'd have a half inch of growth if I just let it grow. The last time I had it really short I usually kept it between an eighth and a half inch. A little longer in the winter."

Ted looked like he was really starting to believe this might happen.

"What would you like me to do?"

"Whatever you want. I mean that, literally.

"Part of what I really enjoy is sitting down in the chair and not knowing what's going to happen. Is it going to be a cute shoulder length bob or a crewcut? The next time I walk down the street are people going to think 'nice hair,' or 'where is her hair?'

"The only thing I don't much like are cuts that are intentionally ugly or demeaning. But, if there's a cut you've always wanted to try, well, I can always buzz it off later if I really hate it."

"You said you like not knowing what's going to happen, but this is consensual and you've said there's really no limit to how short I can cut it."

"Yeah, I mean, I've already agreed to let you cut off all my hair if you want. The fun is how you decide to get there."

"What about role-play?" I got the feeling that the two enthusiasts were forgetting I was in the room.

"It's negotiable. I'm not against playing the naughty niece who got caught stealing hair clips and now has to be punished. I don't mind pretending that my hands and feet are tied to the chair. But that's as far as I'm comfortable going. And no violence. If I feel unsafe, I'll walk."

Ted nodded.

I was finding this conversation unexpectedly revealing, and perhaps a little disturbing and I guess Mary saw that because she patted me on the hand and said, "it's kind of like riding a roller coaster, you have the fun of feeling scared while being perfectly safe.

"It's not that Ted would really want to pressure someone into a haircut she didn't want or that I'd hold still for a minute if someone tried to do that to me. It's just a fun kind of make believe."

I could see that Ted was going to disabuse her of the notion that roller coasters were safe, but he decided to let the main point stand.

"Why a niece?"

"Well, someone you in some way have authority over but not a sexual relationship. I'm too old to be your daughter. . ." Not according to her license, I thought. "This way, if you started feeling, um energized, it would be natural to go have a little private time with Auntie Elaine."

"Oh. You think Auntie Elaine and I might need to take some breaks?"

"I'd be surprised, and kind of disappointed if you didn't. And after all the trouble she's gone to, she'd probably appreciate some private time."

Ted looked at me consideringly.

"Ok, so you don't want to tell me what to do or not do with your hair. But, is there anything else I should be thinking about?"

"Again, up to you. I enjoy going out and showing off my new look after a cut. So, maybe we could go, walk around town, maybe go to lunch somewhere. Not something we have to do, just a thought."

"Hmm." I could see that that touched a chord.

"And what's Elaine doing while we're doing this?"

"Whatever she wants. She could watch or read a magazine. I asked her to be present at least for any cuts where it's just the two of us."

"You think I might get 'energized' and then get confused?"

"Having met you, no. But, we all know there's a sexual component to this. If you and I are alone in the house living something that's a sexual fantasy for both of us, she might wonder at some point if she really knew everything that happened."

Ted nodded, thoughtfully.

"Now, if you want to schedule a trip to the barber, then if she wants to go window shopping, or whatever, that wouldn't be a problem. Haircut stories notwithstanding, I don't think they're really hotbeds of sexual activity.

Ted snorted. "Well, certainly not my barber."

By now it was pretty late and Mary was starting to yawn. "OOhh! Sorry! I was too excited to sleep much last night."

"I think I might have that problem tonight," Ted put in, wryly.

"Maybe then it's time for us all to turn in." Well, if I was the stern Aunt. . .

I checked that Mary had everything she needed in her room before I turned on the security system from the panel in our bedroom.

"Elaine, I don't even know what to say."

I was tempted to suggest he apologize for having been such a jerk before, but reminded myself that bygones are best left gone.

"Good birthday present?"

I still can hardly believe it. But, it's a sensible thing for her to do, really."

It was my turn to snort at his definition of 'sensible.'

We turned in to bed. I thought Ted would be lost in planning the next couple of days, but in a few minutes he turned to me and demonstrated that he was firmly in the here and now.

Ted's always been a early riser, and I knew he was excited about this, but I swear the sound of his tap, tapping on his computer was what woke the birds up on Saturday.

"For the love of God, Ted what are you doing?"

I stumbled out of bed to look over his shoulder. Schematic diagrams of a head with various haircuts littered the table, with notations of how one could be morphed into the next. His web browser was open to a page giving step by step instructions for how to do something called an 'inverted bob.'

To one side was an ordered list with a number of emendations and strikeouts.

"Planning. You know, measure twice, cut once."

"She's not a 2x4."

"No, of course she's not, but the principle's the same. Anyway, I think I have the haircuts pretty well roughed out. There won't actually be that many. I liked the idea of taking her out to let her show off, so that could take up a good part of the days.

"The only thing I'm worried about is, do you know what sort of tools she brought with her?"

"Tools?"

"Yeah, you know, scissors, clips, hair clippers. I looked through your hair stuff in the bathroom," I wondered what time he had gotten up, "and I can use some of it, but it would help to know what she brought."

"I don't think she brought anything." For a man who, only last night, had vehemently insisted that this was never going to happen, the expression of disappointment on his face was almost ludicrous.

"I asked her about that - I told her that you didn't really have any equipment, maybe the scissors from when you used to trim my hair. But, when I told her you were an engineer, she said you'd definitely want to pick out your own stuff."

"Well, and so I would, but we're in the middle of nowhere. Where would I get hairdressing supplies here?"

"I don't know, but when I told her that, she asked where the cabin was. We were on the phone, but she looked on-line and said that there were 2 places within maybe a half-hour's drive that would have everything you'd need."

"We've had this place for 20 years and I never noticed anything like that."

"Have a little faith, Ted. We'll figure it out."

"Maybe I should go ask her, just to help with my planning."

"No! Ted, it's O-dark-thirty in the morning! You're not going to go waking her up to find out where to buy haircutting supplies. She'd probably take one look at you, unshaven and scruffy, and head right out the door.

He looked so disappointed that I said, I'll tell you what, you go wash and make yourself presentable, and then we'll go down and I'll make you some coffee and toast and you can tell me about your plans."

Mollified, he went into the bathroom to do that. While he dressed, I used the bathroom myself. I tidied my hair, and pulled a robe on.

We went downstairs, and while I pulled things out for breakfast, Ted sat at the table and organized his sketches. I was running water for the coffee when I noticed the slight drop in pressure that meant someone was taking a shower. I didn't mention it to Ted, after all, she might want to wash and then do her own puttering before she came down. I did make some extra toast, though.

While the coffee brewed, I sat next to Ted and he outlined his plans for the day. I had to laugh at times. It was the strangest combination of engineering project and a little kid who has been given a weekend to do whatever he wanted. Even though I wasn't into the haircutting aspect, I thought his plans for the weekend sounded fun.

I was just pouring the coffee when I heard bare feet on the floor toward to kitchen. I gestured to Ted to put his plans away and then Mary came in the room. She paused on the threshold and then walked in.

"Hey, good morning. I see I'm not the only one who's up bright and early."

She gave a huge yawn. She was casually dressed in a sweat-shirt and sweats, with her hair, still wet from the shower, hanging down her back. "I saw that you were up, so I figured I might as well come down."

I would have made some polite morning chit-chat, but Ted can be very, um, focused when he's in project mode.

"Hi, Mary. I think we have a problem. Elaine said you didn't bring any gear," thinking about her huge suitcase, I thought that was a bit of a mis-statement, but I figured she'd know what he meant, "and I wasn't expecting this, so I didn't stock up. So, I'm not quite sure. . ."

"Oh, I checked on-line; there's a Sally Beauty Supply about a half hour from here, in fact I passed it on my way in. I called and they are open on Saturdays, but not 'til 9:00," she said with a wry grin at the clock.

"I've passed that place, but isn't it makeup and stuff?"

"They've got some of that, but they've got a pretty deep selection of haircutting stuff for professionals. All sorts of brands of clippers, capes. I can't think of anything standard that you'd need that they wouldn't have. Now, they may not have a particular brand of clipper in stock, but really, I think you'll be satisfied with their selection.

"They've got a website, if you want to get an idea of what they carry. I don't know the URL, but if you google 'sally beauty supply' you'll find it.

Ted pointed his browser in that direction while I handed Mary a plate with some buttered toast.

While he browsed the site and started making a rough shopping list, Mary and I made idle conversation.

Finally, Ted looked up. "You're right. This Sally place has everything I'd need and a pretty good range of selection."

Mary and I carefully kept from giggling as we looked at his shopping list which was starting to look like he was planning for an assault on Everest.

"There is one thing that might be hard to get, though," Mary put in.

Ted looked at her, "no, if they have all this in stock, this really should be everything I need."

"A chair. Doing a trim at a kitchen chair is one thing, but if you're thinking of doing a couple of different styles - well you're pretty tall - and leaning over me sitting on a regular height chair would get old pretty fast."

Ted made a face. Damn! She was right. If I'd thought of it, we had several bar stools at home that would be a good height and I could have brought one of them.

"Hmmm, I think I know where I can get something that would work. Would you mind if it wasn't a proper hairdresser's chair?

Mary laughed, "My boyfriend once had me sit on a fence rail on the porch. Whatever will be comfortable for you is fine with me."

A fence rail, good heavens!

Ted looked up at the clock. It was almost 8:00. He started jotting a list on his folder: Sally Beauty, Chair

"Is there anything else you can think of?"

"Well, there's one thing I would ask you to pick up from Sally's, depending. I didn't know if a shave was on the agenda, but if it is, they have some sunblock especially for shaved heads. It doesn't clog the pores and it reduces the chance of ingrown hairs.

They don't always have it but I used to get it for a friend of mine who shaves his head. I'd send it in his care packages to Iraq. But, of course, only if you think I'll need it."

Ted didn't make a note. I was kind of relieved. I knew Mary would be ok if he wanted to do that, but she was such a pretty girl, I didn't want to see her like that, even knowing it was just temporary.

"Anything else?"

"The only other logistical thing I can think of is - shampooing. It's easy enough to spray my hair wet, but if you're actually into shampooing itself, doing a backbend over the kitchen sink isn't all that relaxing."

"I'll think on that. You know, there are a couple of other errands I think I want to do in town, so maybe I'll take off a little early. Is there anything else either of you want?"

Mary shook her head.

"Elaine, anything for you? The sun, the moon the stars? If they're not in stock, I could special order them."

"Just a happy birthday for my husband."

"One happy birthday, coming up!"

He gathered his folder and keys. He was almost out the door when I reminded him to take some of our reusable shopping bags with him.

Mary and I had a leisurely chat and then we both went upstairs to change. Knowing that Ted would be a while with his shopping, we took our time. I gave Mary the password to our wireless network so she could go on-line while she was waiting.

When I came to her room, she was dressed in jeans and a very flattering simple, light cotton shirt and bare feet. She'd done a very light makeup. If you just looked at her you wouldn't notice the makeup, just her attractiveness. She was sitting on the dressing table bench somewhat awkwardly brushing her still damp hair.

"Oh, hey come on in. I swear, one of the thing I won't miss about this is the contortions of brushing long hair."

"Do you want me to do that for you?"

"Would you mind? That'd be great."

She scooted to the end of the bench and handed me the brush. I pulled her long hair around to the back and started brushing it from the ends, moving up higher with each stroke to ease the tangles out.

Mary heaved a big sigh. "Oh, that feels so nice. I always love having someone else brush my hair, but I haven't had anyone to do it for the longest time."

"But now, today, you're having it cut off, maybe all of it. I don't know exactly what Ted's planning, but I don't think there'll be much left to brush."

I desperately didn't want her to back out, but sitting there brushing her long hair, I was reminded of my daughter. I didn't want her to do something she'd regret, even if it meant Ted would be disappointed.

She half turned to look at me in the mirror. She gave me a smile that told me she really understood not only my words but the thoughts behind them.

"I do love this; it feels wonderful. But, you know? when my hair is clipped short, an inch or less, the first time you run your hands over it, you won't believe how soft it feels. And it feels just as good having it touched as touching it.

"It feels like every nerve ending in your scalp is getting a massage. After a while, I get used to having it short, and I don't notice it as much, but trust me, short can be as much of a sensual pleasure as long."

I kept brushing. I was almost up to her neck now. "This is nearly dry. If you'd like, I'll get a blow-dryer and dry it the rest of the way, and then I could put it in a braid for you."

"I'd love that."

When I came in with my blow-dryer, she had a package of clear elastics on the table.

"When you do the braid, you might want to put one elastic about here," she indicated a spot about halfway down her neck, "and then the other one down at the bottom."

I was going to protest that I could do a braid without the intermediate step, but decided that if that was how she liked it, that was fine.

Her hair was thick and heavy so I played the stream of air from the blow-dryer over the inner sections to make sure it was completely dry before I put the braid in.

I was just brushing her hair smooth before starting the braid, when we heard Ted come into the house.

He came bounding up the steps 2 at a time and knocked on the door frame of the guest room.

"Come on in, we're decent."

He peered his head in, and seemed somewhat taken aback by the picture of me with Mary's long hair in my hands.

"Oh, um, hey, hi. I'm back. It's going to take me about ten-fifteen minutes to set up. Would you mind waiting up here until I'm ready for you? I mean, Mary. Elaine it'd be fine if you wanted to come down early."

"I was just going to give Mary a braid."

"That's terrific. You take your time. I'll give you a shout when I'm ready."

As he bounded back down the stairs, Mary and I shared a look encompassing the utter adorableness of men.

I was originally planning on a French braid, but the length of Mary's hair made that rather awkward. Instead I started the braid up high on the back of her head. Soon I got into a rhythm and before too long I was neatly doubling up the end of the braid and securing it with the second elastic.

Still no word from Ted. I went down to see if he needed any help and found that he'd converted our screened in porch into a mini hairdressing salon. In the center of a the room was a drafting chair, cranked up to the highest setting.

Next to it was one of those trolleys stylists use. The top was full of clips, a variety of scissors and other miscellaneous hairdressing supplies. The lower drawers obviously had stuff in them but the plastic was too opaque to identify the contents.

A professional blow-dryer (I should have reminded him I had one) and a very serious looking black hair clipper hung off one side of the trolley and a full spray bottle off the other. A heavy duty extension cord snaked from the outlet but was made trip-proof by the black electrician's tape securing it to the floor.

Even in the throes of his obsession, Ted was a safety-first engineer!

"How are you doing?"

"Good, how are you doing? She's not getting nervous is she? I mean, she's not . . . "

"Relax, Vidal, she's a lot less nervous than you are."

From the look he gave me, he had on idea who Vidal Sassoon was, but all he said was "do you think she'd be okay if we took some pictures?"

"Yes, we talked about that. Pictures are fine, but she said she wasn't comfortable with videotaping. I brought the good camera and yes, I will take the pictures.

Are you ready?" He looked around and nodded. "I'll go up and get her then."

Mary was just coming out of the bathroom as I came in. I told her Ted was ready and walked her down to the porch, picking up my camera on the way. She looked a little nervous, herself.

As she walked out on the porch she turned around to take it all in. "Oh, this is perfect. Wow." She smiled at Ted.

"Ok, your birthday party has officially commenced and all the guests are here. What would you like me to do?"

"Come stand over here. Elaine would you stand over there and take the pictures from that angle."

We both moved into our assigned places, Ted picked up Mary's braid and snaked it through his fingers. I expected he'd undo the braid and let her hair trail down.

I was stunned, when, instead he picked up the heavy black clippers, flipped them on and pressed the cutting edge into the braid, maybe a half inch above the top elastic.

I wanted to protest, 'no, that's too fast, take it slower.' But, before I could even think to say it, her hair was already halfway severed. A few more pushes and the braid was looped over his left hand.

I looked at Mary, to see how she was taking this. A good two feet of hair, gone, just like that. The look on her face reminded me of her roller coaster analogy. She did look nervous, but excited, too. Like she was balanced between wanting to and fear.

And, in a strange way, I began to understand, at least a little, why she was doing this.

Ted handed her the braid. To my relief, he hung the clippers back on the trolley and reached up both hands, working them up her scalp and pulling her hair free of the stub of braid.

Seeing her hair like that shocked me again. Those tresses that had come down to her chest now only came a little below her chin. The hair hung in ragged lengths, shortest at the back, and then longer at the front. Ted nodded to me and I took some more pictures.

Now Mary smiled and shook her head. "That's much better." She looked at Ted and he nodded her towards the chair.

She hopped up into it and he adjusted the height until he was satisfied. He reached into the trolley and pulled out a black hairdressing cape, out of the package, but still with the original folds.

He snapped in the air to work out the creases and then twirled it to cover her and secured it around her neck. He didn't need to pick up her hair to fasten it.

Mary handed me her braid. I placed it on the table.

He ruffled his fingers through her hair and then picked up a comb and started combing it out. He gave her a part on the left side of her head. I almost prompted him to ask her which side she normally wore her part on, but then realized it wouldn't matter. She wouldn't be keeping it.

He opened his folder and pulled out a picture. Neither Mary nor I would be able to see it with the trolley behind her, but he referred to it periodically as he studied the hang of her hair around her jaw.

Finally, he seemed satisfied. Handing Mary a small towel (it wasn't one of ours, Sally's must have had a record morning) he told her to cover her face and started spraying her hair. When it was pretty damp, he ran the back end of a rat-tailed comb around her head at around the top of ear level and clipped the top section on top of her head.

He started combing out the bottom but soon realized that the spray from the bottle hadn't penetrated all the way through. Towel, spray, comb.

He adjusted Mary's head and then turned to me and explained to me, "I'm going to angle it so it's longer in the front and comes up to the hairline in back with a rounded curve at the back." It was almost like Mary wasn't really there, and he was sharing the experience with me. I nodded, a little nervous myself.

He combed it smooth and then started cutting, taking small snips, moving up and back towards the nape of her neck. He came around the other side and repeated the process. He combed it again and contemplated her from the front. Mary sat there quietly as he snipped a few stray pieces.

Ted came around behind her and undid the clips at the top of her head. He repeated the process, now telling me, "I'm going to cut this layer a little longer, so it'll curl around the shorter layer." Soon, it was done and he was combing it straight.

It looked like a nice, even job to me and I was surprised by his skill.

He started blow-drying it out, curling it under, so that it nestled under her chin, angling up in the back until it just touched her hairline. When he had it dry, he gave it one last comb out and then moved around to the back.

I thought he was done, so I was startled when he picked up the clippers. I must have moved, because he smiled at me and said,"I'm just tidying up some stray hairs on the neck."

He held her hair up with one hand and ran the clippers quickly along the neck with the next. He brushed the loose hairs away with a towel and then gave her a couple of quick scrapes with a safety razor.

He patted her hair back in place with his hands and then stepped back to admire his work. He'd done a good job. I never would have guessed that a professional hadn't done it, and it was a flattering choice for her. Mary swung her head gently to let us get the effect.

Ted turned to me, "what do you think?"

"You never cease to amaze me. I think it looks great. Very pretty and feminine and it shows off her face. The only thing. . . "

"Yeesss?"

"Well, it doesn't matter because we all know she's not keeping it, but if this were a style she was going to be living with. . . it's already very full, and I'm thinking on a humid day, now that her hair doesn't weigh so much, she could end up with some serious poufy-ness."

"That's true. If she were keeping this, there are a couple of things I could do to reduce the volume. I think for now I'll do the one that's a little more daring.

"Before I begin, Mary, would you like to see this look?"

He handed her one large mirror and held another one behind her.

"That's great. If I weren't going far away from civilization and regular access to a blow dryer, I'd be tempted to stop there."

"Then I'm happy you're heading to the wilderness."

He stepped behind her and started securing the top layer of her hair on top of her head with butterfly clips again. A growl from Mary's stomach made him look at his watch.

"It's a little later than I'd hoped.

"Would you both be ok if we stopped and had some snacks after this cut and then went out in a couple of hours for a late lunch? I was thinking of a late dinner."

We both agreed that that would be fine.

He picked up the scissors and a comb. First he trimmed the under layer of hair so it extended less than an inch past her natural hairline on both sides. Then he started chopping at the hair in the back. He didn't seem to be aiming for a particular length, just getting rid of the volume.

"I could use the clippers for this, but I thought I'd save them for later. If I were doing this as a real cut, I'd take this undercut a lot shorter, but this will give you an idea and still leave enough to play with later." Again, Ted was explaining it to me.

He took a couple of last snips and then smoothed the hair down. He undid the clip, and let the rest of her hair tumble down. Already, I could see it hung a lot smoother. He lightly damped it and smoothed it into shape. Mary shook her head. It had a nice swing to it. I took some pictures.

I'd also noticed something else. And I suspected Ted didn't know quite how to play this part of the fantasy. So I intervened.

"Ted, if you're done, maybe Mary could go make herself a snack, and then admire herself. The big mirror in the living room would give you a great view," I added to Mary.

She fielded it admirably. "That'd be great. You all must be getting a bit tired, so if you wanted to take a bit of a break, I can amuse myself."

She kept her eyes firmly above the level of Ted's jeans which were rapidly becoming a little tight around the crotch.

I took Ted's hand and led him upstairs.

Mary headed towards to kitchen. I was sure she could forage for herself.

Normally, our lovemaking was enthusiastic, even passionate, but well, we'd been doing it for almost 30 years.

This afternoon, Ted was like a sailor home after a year solidly at sea. Fortunately, his very passion was contagious and it didn't take long before I was as eager for him as a wife who has been waiting for her husband at sea.

Surprisingly, Ted's need didn't make him quick to finish. When we both finally came, we lay there seriously winded. After a few minutes catching his breath, Ted hitched himself up a bit on the pillows and then pulled me up to cuddle against his body.

He smiled at me lovingly. "Do you want to just spend the rest of the afternoon snuggling? I could re-arrange my schedule."

"No, we can snuggle anytime. Your birthday will be over on Monday."

"Well, then maybe just snuggle a little."

Before too long, we were trooping back downstairs. Mary was sitting, obviously content reading a book and munching some chips. "I made myself a PB&J sandwich. Crazy Richard's, that's good peanut butter."

I made a quick snack for Ted (I wasn't hungry yet), and we walked back on the porch.

Ted looked at his folder which he'd left on the trolley - having been distracted at the time - and Mary volunteered, "I was amazingly virtuous and didn't peek."

She hopped in the chair and swung her hair again. "I like this. Demure on the top, but with a sexy secret underneath."

"Good." Ted swung the cape around her and fastened it once again.

Towel, spray, comb. This time he combed it radially out from the crown of her head, no part. No sectioning, he just started cutting it in a smooth oval from the hairline at the base of her neck, widening it out smoothly so that by the time he was cutting bangs for her they were about 2" long. He combed it smooth and snipped off a few stray hairs.

Truthfully, it was a little institutional looking, and not really to my taste. Ted smiled reassuringly at me. "It'll look better when I blow a little volume into it."

That's what he did, curling the ends under, towards her face, and then using the round brush to encourage her hair's natural wave. When he was finished it looked bouncy and cute. It wouldn't have been a style I would have chosen for her, but if she wanted something to make her look younger, that was it.

We only paused briefly for the pictures and Mary's examination of herself in the mirror, and then Ted was spraying her hair again.

This time, it was the hair on the top of her head that he was chopping at. I reminded myself that Ted measured three times before cutting once, but it struck me as a bit random.

So, I was surprised when he stepped back to assess his work to realize that he'd roughed in a longish pixie cut. He picked up the clippers, and adjusted a dial.

I hoped he knew what he was doing, but he seemed very confident as he brought them up to the back of Mary's neck and started running them up, almost to her crown. Blond hairs rained down the cape and softly cascaded to the floor.

Mary made a little sound, somewhere between a sigh and a moan. She caught my eye and looked at me a little apologetically, "that feels really nice."

That seemed hard to believe, but from her little smile she was clearly enjoying it.

I couldn't tell how long the hair was that was left at the back. Not more than an inch and a half, I'd guess.

Soon, he was done with the clippers. He walked around, snipping at loose ends. He put down the scissors and pulled a pot of hair gel from one of the lower drawers. He rubbed some between his hands and then lightly smoothed it over Mary's head.

He wiped his hands and then picked up the hairdryer. Instead of blowing her hair smooth, he deliberately tousled it so that when she was done her hair had that, 'I paid my hairdresser a lot of money to make it look like I just rolled out of bed' look. Very stylish, very flattering.

This haircut really drew attention to her face. I realized that with longer hair you noticed the hair more, but her eyes less.

She seemed pleased when Ted handed her the mirror. She reached up to feel it, being careful not to disarrange Ted's work.

"This I really like."

Me, too, actually. It was a little young, though, a little sporty. Not too young for Mary, of course.

Mary looked disappointed when Ted carefully pulled the cape off of her, making sure he spilled he clippings onto the floor, and not on her. "Are we done?"

"I think it's time for a break."

Mary very carefully didn't look down. Ted was obviously getting more comfortable with her because he laughed and said "for lunch! You'll find as you get older that recharge times get longer.

"I was thinking we'd drive into town, I'd take you both to a late lunch at the Lakehouse and then we walk around town for a bit."

Mary and I took a quick break to freshen up - I told her what she was wearing was fine for the Lakehouse - and in a few minutes we were in Ted's car, driving to town.

I knew Ted had something planned because he handed me a folded up piece of paper and asked me to put in in a pocket of my purse so it wouldn't get crumpled.

We had a lovely lunch. Mary attacked her cheeseburger with a gusto that did both of our hearts good. Clearly a woman who knew it was ok to enjoy herself. She did refuse dessert but she explained that that was only because if she had it, she'd have to go find someplace for a nap.

As we came out of the restaurant, Ted suggested we take a little walk, to burn off our lunches. We both enjoyed showing Mary the town, especially festive with holiday tourists. Mary looked at the old buildings, the historic landmarks, and I watched the passersby look at Mary.

Not all of them of course. But a fair number of the men, and a few of the women, did seem very taken with her. I'm sure she attracted her share of stares when she'd had long, blond hair. But, going from my own observations, now she looked more confident, sexier, and in some strange way, more of a person, rather than a look.

She'd said she enjoyed showing off her short hair, so I knew she had to be aware of the attention she was getting, but she wasn't obvious about it, the only sign that this was an unusual day for her was that every once in a while her hand snuck up to touch her hair.

And how was Ted enjoying all this?

He was beaming. I'm sure nobody looking at him would have realized the source of his contentment. He looked like a man pleased to be out on a beautiful day with his wife, showing a favorite niece the sights.

If you'd asked me, I would have said we were wandering around town aimlessly.

If you'd asked me before we wound up in front of a hairstyling salon, that is.

It wasn't someplace I'd ever gone, and it wasn't especially high end. But it was nice enough. Busy, but not crazy.

Ted walked us over to a little park, and said, "Ready for the next step?"

Mary smiled and said, "yes, absolutely."

"Ok, we're going to go in there and I'm going to ask a stylist to give you a particular cut. I'll hand her a picture showing the cut and details about length and stuff. I'll tell her that the cut is to be a surprise to you, so she isn't to show you the picture. You just go along with it."

"Is there a back story? Am I the naughty niece, who can't have nice things?" There was a laugh in her voice as she said it.

"No, you're just bored with what you've got, you've been wearing your hair the same way for years, and you thought you'd like a change. So, you asked your friend's husband, who's good at these things, to come up with a surprise for you."

"Ok, I can do that."

I looked at the two of them. "Is this the part where I go look in shop windows?"

Ted looked at me, somewhat concerned. "Actually, I was really hoping you'd come in with us. I won't look so out of place if you're there."

"Good plan." I smiled to show I was in.

We walked in. There were a number of people waiting, so I thought we might need to come back later. But when Mary came to the counter and said she'd like a haircut, the receptionist's eyes just barely flickered at Ted before saying, "go right on back, Erin is free."

I suspected that on the contrary Erin had been well paid indeed.

Mary was quickly settled in the chair and Erin had the cape around her neck. "So, what do you want today? Trim?"

"Actually, it's a surprise." The stylist looked momentarily annoyed, Ted obviously hadn't told her the whole plan.

"Sorry, what I mean is I was getting really bored with the style I have, so I asked my friend, Ted," she waved to Ted and me standing back a bit, "to pick out a style for me.

"But, I wanted it to be a surprise, so he'll tell you what the style is and then you cut it like that. But don't tell me what it's going to be."

The stylist looked somewhat suspicious, but maybe they hear weirder things all the time, because she walked a little bit away with Ted and they started conferring over the picture she'd brought.

I guess Erin didn't want to run the risk of an unhappy client, because she came back to Mary and said, "are you really sure you want to do this? The style he's talking about is really short."

"Whatever he showed you is fine. Really, I promise."

Erin reluctantly accepted that. She came up to run her fingers through Mary's hair. "You've got product in it. This will need to be shampooed before I can cut it, and all the shampoo girls are busy."

Something about the way she said it made me think we were back on script.

Mary looked around blankly. Ted stepped up.

"I'm not doing anything. If you want, I can wash it for her."

Not known for his acting skills, my Ted, but Erin just said, "okay."

Ted handed me his watch (he had on a short sleeved shirt) and Erin walked them back to a sink.

She draped a towel around Mary's neck, showed Ted where the shampoo and conditioner were and then, with Mary seated, dropped a towel in her lap, saying, "to dry her hair, when she's done."

I went back to sit in the waiting area. I could see Ted leaning over Mary at the sink, and I'd have a good view of the cut.

I saw Ted testing the water temperature before starting to spray Mary's head. He started at the back of her head and then moving up towards her forehead. When he had her hair completely wet, he took a big dollop of shampoo, far more than he needed and started working it into her scalp. I knew he wouldn't be rough with her, but I was still surprised at how gentle he was.

Mary's eyes were closed and she was smiling. Clearly this was another thing that felt really good. Ted was very thorough, working the shampoo in through all her hair. After a final massage of her temples with the shampoo he started spritzing it away with the hose.

He rinsed until there was not a trace of shampoo and then got a more moderate handful of conditioner. Once again working it in was an excuse for a scalp massage, and once again he was punctilious to make sure that her hair rinsed clean.

He turned off the tap and rubbed the excess moisture off her hair with the extra towel. That wasn't how my stylist did it, but it was effective and in a few minutes Mary was on her feet and Ted was escorting her back to Erin's station.

Erin caught up the towel that was still around Mary's shoulders and lobbed it into a towel hamper, and Ted came to sit next to me.

As he sat down, I murmured to him, "you know, other people have jacuzzi tubs, maybe we could get a stylist's sink in the bathroom. . . "

He smiled at me.

The shop was small enough that we could hear Erin say, "now you're sure about this?"

"Yes, I heard you say it was very short. I'm okay with that."

"Okay. I'm going to need to use the clippers for this cut. . ."

Mary nodded that that was fine.

"So, first I'm going to have to blow this dry."

"Not a problem. At this length it doesn't take long."

"It's going to take even less time when you walk out of here."

"Good."

Whatever the cut was, it didn't seem that the hair needed be blow-dried smooth for it, because Erin just worked the dryer every which way, getting the moisture out of Mary's hair.

When she was done, Mary's hair was dry, but looked like she'd gotten caught in a windstorm.

Erin ran her fingers through Mary's hair to make sure it was really dry, and then sort of combed it just sort of approximately into place. That seemed strange. Until she picked up the clippers.

Unlike Ted's clippers, she didn't have a dial she adjusted. Instead she sorted through a drawer until she found the particular, shaped, little plastic comb she was looking for. She snapped it on the clippers and turned them on.

Ted leaned forward.

She placed the clippers at the back of Mary's neck and started buzzing them up to the top. At the back, barely any hair came off, just a fraction.

Not so when she moved to the side. Here, clumps started falling. Finally, she had Mary bend her head forward, and she mowed off the top.

God! It was so short!

The hair on the top of her head stood straight up. I'd known this was going to come, eventually, but I was so startled I put my hands up to my mouth to smother an exclamation.

Ted put his hand on my knee. He leaned in close to me and whispered, "it's an inch and a half all over. It'll look different when she styles it. See how Mary is smiling."

The last part was true. The stylist had taken a step back, I think to let Mary see the worst.

Instead of looking shocked or upset, Mary reached up a hand to touch it. She obviously liked what she felt, because she smiled and said, "nice."

The stylist moved back in with a different pair of clippers, 'oh, no, please, not shorter, I need some time to adjust to this,' I wanted to beg.

But, as Ted had, she was merely using them to cleanup the neckline. Mary had a lot more neckline now than before. Unlike Ted, Erin used a straight razor to clear away any stubble.

I thought this was the style and I was starting to wonder if it would be embarrassing to be walking back to our car with a 'niece' who had a crew-cut, even if it was a whole inch and a half long.

Erin wasn't done, though. She took some pomade and slicked Mary's hair down, first, to the front, and then down the sides. The back lay pretty flat on it's own, so she just lightly slid her hands down that to give it a little sheen. Then she used a comb and then her fingers to tousle it a bit. Mary's hair lay almost flat against her head with just a bit of an overhang at her forehead.

"Nice," Mary said again. "I've seen a number of older women in the city with this style. I mean, like mid-forties, not eighty-year olds. I always thought it looked very elegant."

"It is a good style, really," Erin agreed.

"It's just most women freak out when you see how short I've cut it, especially if they have hair like yours that stands up, and you can't get them to calm down enough to see that it styles different. This is the one style where having hair that doesn't have much body is an advantage - it just lies down naturally. But women with hair like that always think they have to have it long."

Mary and Erin exchanged a look on the silliness of women who don't trust their stylists and I remembered that Erin had had her own doubts.

"It does make you look older than you did when you walked in here though."

"Well, that's the thing, when I asked Ted to pick out a style for me, one of the things I mentioned was that a lot of people at work didn't take me seriously, ditzy blond, you know. I think this will make people look at me with more respect."

"You know, I think you're right," Erin agreed.

I knew the thing about looking mature for work was Mary improvising, but they were right. It was a mature, very confident, and rather authoritative look. Not the haircut of a sexual fetishist, just someone very secure.

Erin used the blow-dryer to dust the clippings off, and then slipped the cape off Mary. Mary thanked her and walked up to the desk to pay for her haircut, but Ted was by her side, tendering his credit card.

"I insist, you let me choose the style, I should pay for it."

"Well, thanks."

Mary dug in her purse to get money for the tip, but again Ted forestalled her. I don't know how much he handed to Erin, but she looked very pleased indeed.

We walked out into the warm sunshine. Mary turned to me, "were you freaking out when she started buzzing all my hair off?" she asked merrily.

"Yes.

"Seriously, I thought I was going to have go to find a scarf so that you could get back to the car. But, you were just so casual like it was perfectly fine. Did you know what she was going to do with it?"

"No, not exactly, but I figured an inch and a half is on the long side for a buzz-cut, cause you do have hair standing out every which way, like a stylized representation of the sun, so I guessed there was something more.

"I really do like this. I wasn't just saying that. I have seen professional women with their hair like this, but they're usually women whose hair has gone silver so I never really thought of it for myself."

Ted laughed and showed us the picture he'd given Erin. It was of a very attractive older woman with silver hair. I tucked it back in my purse.

"So, what now?"

"Home. I don't know about you two, but I could use a nap."

"Oh, God, I wish you hadn't said that," Mary yawned.

"That's good. We'll all have a rest, and then we'll go to the club for dinner around 8:00."

We all managed to stay on our feet long enough to get home. As Ted and I were getting ready to put our bed to its other purpose, I asked him, "are you sure you want to take Mary to the club? I mean, there'll be people we know there."

"Don't you? Do you think she won't know what forks to use? Or, are you worried about people we know seeing us with someone with really short hair? 'Cause if it's going to make you uncomfortable, I'd definitely rather go somewhere else."

"No, it isn't that. Truthfully, I think that haircut looks beautiful on her, I don't know, I guess it just feels strange.

"But, you know, actually, it might be fun to see some of our friends."

As it happened it was fun to see our friends. It was a pretty typical night at the club. The only thing that stuck out was a conversation I had with some of the other wives. There were about a half dozen of us there who were on the building restoration committee. We'd gone off to look at some of the renovation work that was being done, while the rest of the group were sitting in the lounge having coffee. We were talking about my friend, Mary and one of the women said:

"God, I wish I could cut my hair like that, but my husband would freak."

I was surprised but a number of women said that they'd do it if they could.

We're not a hard drinking, late night crowd and we were home and tucked in our beds by midnight.

I heard Ted clicking on his computer sometime in the early morning, but whatever he was doing he soon came back to bed and we both fell back asleep.

The next time I woke up, Ted was employing a very ingenious technique to bring me awake happy. After a few minutes of enjoying that, I tugged on his hair so he'd bring his face up to mine. Very soon we were both making each other very happy indeed.

"So, I'm guessing you want something from me, hmm?"

Ted managed to look offended and worried at the same time. "I don't only do that when I want something from you, do I?"

"No, but you always do it when you want something."

"That's not true! Remember that time on the Turnpike when I wanted you to take the first exit. . . I didn't even think of doing it then."

We giggled together at the image.

"Let me rephrase that. What you were thinking we'd do today?"

"Well, that kind of depends on you." Hah! I knew it!

". . . What I'd like to do is, the three of us drive to that mall outside Springfield. There's a hairsalon/barber shop that will be open at 11:00 there. I thought Mary could get her next haircut there, and then we'd drive to that little college town and find someplace nice to have brunch."

"Sounds good to me. So, how does it depend on me?"

"Well, the thing is, yesterday you said you'd be kind of uncomfortable walking around with Mary with her hair in a crew-cut. The style she has now is the last of the ones that's fairly conventional. The next ones, I think they'll be flattering, but they're definitely going to draw some stares.

"I think it'd be fun to walk around with her and show her off in the Mall and then in town. But if it's going to make you uncomfortable, then it won't be fun, so I wouldn't want to do it.

"So, do you think it'd feel too weird for you? 'Cause if so, I can think of other things that we could do."

I thought about it. Honestly, we were going outside my comfort zone. But, I reminded myself, I wouldn't know anyone in either place, so no reason for me to feel vicariously self-conscious.

And, it was Ted's birthday, and he'd asked so nicely.

"I think that sounds perfect."

We washed and dressed and went downstairs. Before too long, Mary came down and joined us for toast and coffee. She'd showered and washed the hair gel out of her hair, so it was sticking out in all directions.

Ted outlined the basic plan and Mary agreed that it sounded fun. After our light breakfast, she went upstairs to get dressed for the day. She came down in a nice pair of gray slacks, a black belt and a blue camp shirt unbuttoned enough to show some cleavage. I wasn't used to seeing her wearing jewelry, but the pearl necklace and matching earrings went perfectly.

What didn't go so perfectly was her hair which was now almost dry but still all rumpled.

"I wasn't sure what to do with my hair, so I just left it like this."

Ted had her sit in a kitchen chair and then deftly used some of the pomade to sleek it down, tousling it a little for a casual look.

"It's a little early for the hair place, but the mall opens before that, so shall we go now and then walk around until it opens?"

Mary and I were happy to agree with that. As Ted drove, I found myself stealing glimpses of Mary in the mirror. I'd thought she was lovely looking when I met her and she was lovely looking now. But now, she just looked so much more elegant and sophisticated looking. I'd never realized that long hair could actually be a disadvantage, but she definitely looked better without it.

Our timing was perfect. We walked into the mall about 20 minutes after they opened the doors. Ted checked the location of the salon/barbershop on the mall map, and we proceeded to explore the mall. Mary had to try out each of the massaging chairs in Brookstone and Ted wanted to buy all the grandkids' presents for the next year in the Discovery store.

Soon, however, Ted was shepherding us down a side aisle to our destination. Ted had said it was a salon/barbershop, but I just thought he meant it was a unisex haircutting place. As it turned out, it had a barbershop on one side and a women's salon on the other.

As we came in the main entrance, Ted led us over to the barbershop side. The woman at the counter said, "can I help you?"

"Yes, my friend would like a haircut."

"Women's haircuts are on the other side."

"She'd like a flattop, back and sides short but not white-walled."

I understood about half of that but the woman at the counter clearly knew what he meant and agreed that Mary was at the right counter.

"Come on back. Julie will be your barber today."

We walked into the back and this time explained to Julie what Mary was going to have done. Julie said, "well, let's wash out this product and see what we've got to work with."

She fastened a cape around Mary's neck and led her back to the sinks. Ted and I settled ourselves in a couple of chairs. We couldn't see Mary's shampoo, but we were perfectly placed to watch the cut. In a few minutes, Julie was leading Mary back to the chair. Even wet, most of Mary's hair was sticking up. Julie used the blow-dryer to get the water out of Mary's hair and then said, "now tell me exactly what we're doing here?"

Mary waved to Ted and he came over and described what he was looking for.

"How long do you want me to leave the top?"

"Start with as long as you can leave it to make the flattop, and then we can take it down if that's too long."

"Well, she's got enough body in her hair, she could probably do a 3" mohawk and not have to use gel to make it stand up.

"What about the back and sides?"

"Start at an inch, they'll probably need to be shorter, but her hair's so light I don't want to get it too short."

"Okay."

Julie loosened the cape around Mary's neck. She held a piece of tissue paper against Mary's neck with one hand and refastened the cape over it with the other.

Mary settled herself in the chair. Julie combed her hair to see the natural direction it grew in, and where the cowlicks were, and then picked up the clippers.

I noticed a difference from the haircut with Erin. Julie didn't ask Mary if this was what she wanted, if she was sure. Mary had pointed to Ted as the person who would decide her haircut and so Julie was doing what Ted asked for.

Julie had the clippers with the plastic comb attachments, too. She fitted one to the clippers, tipped Mary's head forward and started shearing her hair.

A half an inch isn't a lot of hair. But Mary didn't have a lot of hair left. She lost a third of the length she had in a few quick passes up the back and a couple of swipes at the side.

Julie looked over to Ted and said, "I'm going to make the flattop and then I'll blend in the hair on the sides." He nodded.

Julie picked up a wide comb and combed Mary's hair straight up a few times to get a sense of the height. She snapped the plastic attachment off the clippers and combed the hair up one more time.

This time, she ran the clippers over the hair sticking up over the top of the comb. She repeated the process, moving the comb a little forward along Mary's head the whole time. Finally when she got to Mary's forehead she came around to the side and repeated the process from left to right.

She stepped back to look at Mary in the mirror. She seemed satisfied with the top, and indeed it looked perfectly level to me, and started trimming the hair along the sides to blend in.

In a surprisingly short amount of time, she was looking to Ted for his opinion. He walked over and inspected Mary's head.

"It's a nice job, but I think the top's a little too long, it looks a little too extreme. Also, can you take the sides down to three quarters?"

"Leave her some hair, but make it a little crisper looking?"

"Exactly."

Julie repeated her actions of before. Now that she had roughed in the cut already it seemed to go faster and it was not very long before Ted was declaring himself pleased with the cut. Julie agreed, saying that Mary's hair really lent itself to this style.

Mary didn't say anything, but I could see her smug expression in the mirror.

This time, there wasn't much to clean up at the nape, but Julie found a few hairs that were out of place. As she was scraping them with the razor, Ted said, "I have an idea, can you take the cape off, and, Mary, would you stand up for a minute?"

Ted walked around Mary for a minute. He reached up and felt the back of her head and then said, "it's good, but what do you think of taking the hairline up to the occipital bulge, here?

"I think it would look great, really accentuate the neck, but it'd be kind of high maintenance for her, even with her light hair."

"That won't be a problem," Ted said blandly.

Julie had Mary sit back down in the chair. She tore off a fresh piece of tissue paper and again closed the cape around the paper. She probed the back of Mary's head and conferred with Ted about where he wanted the line redrawn.

With that settled, she picked up the clippers and began cutting down from the point they had agreed on. Once she had the area exposed, she picked up a smaller, battery powered clipper and started creating an arc down around the back of Mary's neck. She stopped frequently to check that the sides were even and that she was creating an aesthetically pleasing curve.

Satisfied with her work, she waved Ted over. "That's perfect."

He ran his hand over the newly exposed section. "Can you shave it?"

"Yeah, sure. If you want a foam shave, get it really smooth, there's an extra charge."

"Do it."

Julie pulled out a razor and put it on her workspace. She then walked over to a foam dispenser and released a good sized dollop into her right hand. She tipped Mary's head down so that the skin on the neck was pulled taut and began massaging the foam into her skin.

I heard Mary sigh.

In a minute or so, Julie walked over to a sink and rinsed the foam off her hands, she came back, said, "I'll give that a few minutes to get everything softened," and walked to the back of the shop.

It was more like 5 and I was beginning to think Mary was falling asleep in the chair when Julie came back. She poked at the hair under the foam with one finger and said, "that should do it."

She wiped off the finger and picked up her razor. She took smooth, short strokes in the direction of the hair growth, stopping frequently to wipe the foam off her razor.

With her head bent, I couldn't see Mary's expression, but everything about her body posture suggested she was completely relaxed.

Julie exposed first the right, then the left side and finally straight down the center. I wondered what that felt like, the cool razor sliding down the ridge of the tendon.

Julie wiped away some excess foam and then ran her hand down and then back up the area she had reclaimed. She brought the razor up to touch up two sections and then called Ted over.

His hands caressed Mary's neck, first the fingertips, then his whole hands. He brought his hands up through her hair, finally ruffling them through the plane at the top.

"Excellent. If you can just use a little styling gel at the edges of the flattop, she's done."

Julie did so and in a couple of minutes Mary was standing up while Julie dusted a few stray hairs off of her.

Mary walked over to me and looked in the mirror above my head. She ran her own fingers over the shorn hair and then her shaved neck. "You have to feel this."

She sat down next to me. I've never been a touchie-feelie person and stroking another woman's shorn head seemed a bit personal. But I didn't want to be a party-pooper, so I reached up and gingerly stroked the flattop. It did feel like velvet. This close I could see that the outer edges of the flattop were around an inch long and the center was pretty short indeed.

The soft touch and Mary's pleased expression, encouraged me to explore further. The hair on the back and the sides lay flat and smooth, but it was fun to ruffle the short hairs through my fingers. Finally, not knowing if Mary expected me to, I stroked my fingers down to her shaved neck. Mary gave a little shiver. She smiled at me, "that tickles."

By this time Ted had paid the bill and given Julie a tip. Mary thanked Julie and we walked out into the mall.

It was still a little early to go for brunch so we walked around the mall. This time Mary was definitely getting covert, and some not so covert looks. I wasn't uncomfortable at all, though. She looked great. This look drew even more attention to her face and made her look drop dead sexy.

The raised hairline lengthened her neck dramatically and I swear it made her look taller. She was obviously pleased with it, as she was walking with her head very erect.

And Ted, well, Ted. If he'd looked pleased walking around town yesterday, now he looked like he'd just won the lottery and the Nobel Prize (if they gave one for engineering) in the same day.

I discreetly looked down, but it seemed that 'discharging the batteries' earlier meant we didn't need to find someplace to um, rest now.

It was strange. I'd always had a kind of negative vibe about this whole haircutting business because it seemed like it was about taking away women's beauty. But, at least for Ted, it seemed that he was interested in exposing it, but in a different way.

Finally, Mary turned to us and said, "I hope it's almost time for brunch, 'cause I'm starving."

We went to a charming restaurant where we could sit on an outdoor patio. Ted and I had the buffet and Mary tackled a perfectly enormous pile of banana pancakes with butter and maple syrup.

In a college town, Mary's appearance was less out of the ordinary, but I enjoyed watching people pretending not to watch her.

"How do you do it?"

"What, eat my own weight in pancakes?" She smiled and continued. "Confidence. If you act like what you're doing is exactly right, people tend to just accept it."

"Where do you get the confidence?"

"From acting like you have it already. Nobody really knows what you're thinking. All you need to do is figure out how you can project an impression of absolute assurance, people go along with it, and then that causes you to feel confident."

"Oh. So how do you get around that many pancakes?"

She laughed, "mostly by remembering that when the supplies run low we'll be getting our protein by eating grubs."

By the time we were finished, I don't think I was the only one thinking of a nap.

Back home, we offered to split the Sunday papers with Mary but she said that when she woke up she'd read the news on-line.

We all then retired to enjoy that pinnacle of western civilization, the Sunday afternoon nap.

This time I woke up before Ted. I'd nearly worked my way through the first and second sections of the paper when he woke up. He wanted to relive the events of the day, so we had a good conversation about what he thought when the clippers started and what I'd noticed watching the men watch Mary.

Pretty soon, I was reminded that this was a sexual fetish for Ted. And, you know what? I was okay with that.

It was a good thing Mary didn't want the papers because, by the time we were done, they were scattered all around our bed.

When we came down, Mary was sitting on a couch out on the porch, reading a book. She'd changed into a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. She hadn't replaced her makeup and she looked just fine.

We all agreed that we'd had good rests. Mary's expression suggested that she knew we'd combined ours with a little exercise, but she obviously thought that was a good thing.

None of us were hungry, but Ted went into the kitchen to get a beer for himself and a glass of wine for me. Mary had a soda, which she said was pulling her into the land of the waking.

We spent some time chatting about the last couple of days. When I'd arranged this, I hadn't really believed that we could fill up an entire weekend, but now I wished that we weren't going to be leaving on Monday.

Ted was just finishing his beer when he said, "are you ready for me to do the next step now?"

"If you are. Do you want me to go wash the product out of my hair?"

"Is it sticky?"

"No, I think it's water based."

Ted came over to feel it, "no, that won't be a problem."

"Wait!" I said "this style's so flattering, don't you want to keep it a while longer?

Ted and Mary looked at each other and then shook their heads at the same time.

"No," Mary explained, "it is a great cut and if I were looking for a very bold look to make a splash in the social scene this would be it, but I think both Ted and I look at it as one more thing to experience and then move on. We've showed it off in public and you've got the pictures, so, if Ted's ready, I'm ready.

"Do you want me to change?"

"No, what you've got on is fine."

Even though it was about 5:30, the summer light was still bright on the porch.

Mary sat down in the chair and Ted pulled the cape around her. He ran his fingers through her hair, fluffing it in all directions. "Hmmm. Actually, I think I would rather wash that stuff out before we begin."

"Ok, I'll run up and step under the shower for a minute."

"We could just wash it in the sink, if you don't mind. Elaine used to do our daughter's hair that way sometimes."

"That's fine with me."

Ted bounded up the stairs to get some shampoo and, I hoped, a towel, and Mary turned to me. "Don't worry, it'll be cute."

"You don't even know what he's planning to do."

"No, but they've all been cute or better so far, so I figure we're on a roll."

Ted came down with the biggest bottles of shampoo and conditioner from our bathroom and 3 towels.

Mary turned on the water on and leaned her head over the sink. It was kind of an awkward position, and after a moment I said, "here, you just concentrate on keeping your head down and I'll do the washing."

I sprayed her head with the hose, working the water thoroughly into her hair and especially into the bits of styling gel. I put down the hose and turned the faucet to the side and started working the shampoo into her hair. I used my nails to give her a gentle scalp massage as I coated all her hair with the shampoo and then again as I rinsed it away.

With her hair as short as it was, I didn't think she really needed conditioner. But I couldn't deny that at this length her hair was pettably soft, so keeping it soft seemed like a good idea.

As I waited for the conditioner to penetrate, I rinsed the coating off my hands and whiled away the time by massaging her outstretched neck. I ran my fingers over they newly shaved skin and worked my thumbs in below the prominent bones at the back of her head.

Rinse, working my fingers easily through her hair to remove all residue of the conditioner. I turned off the water and dried my own hands before covering her head and giving it a brisk rub.

Mary straightened up and took over the job of rubbing the water from her head and face. Soon, she was damp-dry and heading back towards the chair.

Ted fluffed her hair a little dry with his fingers and then turned the blow-dryer to work on it. It didn't take long before it was dry.

Even without any attempt to style it, her hair was almost as perfect as it had been with she walked out of the barber's. There were a few places where the hairs wanted to go in the wrong direction. But she could walk down the street right now, and it would be fine.

That was something I envied. I couldn't remember when I'd ever had wash and go hair. I've always had wash and style and adjust hair.

Ted fluffed his hands through her hair and then bent down the examine the hair on the very top of her head. He seemed to be measuring it against his finger.

He picked up the clippers.

Once more he adjusted the dial. He seemed to be undecided between two settings. He finally picked one and the clippers whirred into life.

Ted tilted Mary's head forward and started mowing the clippers up the back of her head. There wasn't a huge amount coming off, but if I remembered right, she only had three quarters of an inch back there.

Ted took smooth steady strokes up the back of her head, bits of hair falling down the cape. Before long, he was done with the back. He clipped high on the sides, the clippers biting into the longish hairs on the sides of the flattop. Finally, he bent her head forward and ran the clippers all the way down the top of her head, erasing the flattop.

He straightened her head and considered her thoughtfully. Mary may have known what he was thinking because she said, "my head is actually pretty flat on top, anyway."

"Yeah, but I think I'm gonna take it down a notch, anyway."

Mary nodded and Ted adjusted the dial on his clippers. Instead of going around to the back, he started in the front. This time, when he'd finished clipping her hair front to back, he ran the clippers from side to side. When the entire front of her head was done, he went around to the back and repeated the same process there.

Now it was just little clouds of hair coming off, like dandelion fluff.

At first I didn't understand why he was doing it that way and then I realized he did the same thing with the lawn mower so he wouldn't leave tracks.

Soon he traded the clippers for the blow-dryer. Surely he didn't think he was going to have anything to style, but it soon became obvious that he was just clearing the specks of hair off of her.

He brushed his hands over her head, down, to the sides, down the back and down the shaved nape and then up again.

I had come around to the front to take pictures from there and the two of them seemed to be mirroring the same sensual pleasure.

He reached around and pulled the cape away from her, letting the rest of the hairs slide to the floor. Mary went to get up, but he pushed her shoulders gently, settling her back into the chair.

Ted called me to come over to him. He put the camera down. Taking my hands in his, he feathered my hands over Mary's hair. The flattop was velvety before, but this, having it all one length covering her scalp evenly was like a plush fur. It was a extraordinary feeling. I remembered that Mary had said that as good as it felt to touch, it felt even better to have hair this short be touched. This must have felt very good indeed.

Finally I backed away to consider the haircut visually. The hair was maybe half an inch all around, and it framed the tan of her skin like a light colored cap. I'd been so taken aback by the inch and a half crew-cut that I'd expected that a shorter one would be more disturbing. But it was kind of unobtrusive in a way, like you could no longer evaluate it as hair, it was now more like a color accent, like makeup or a piece of jewelry.

I decided I'd have to assess it in brighter daylight to decide whether I liked it, but it certainly was at least cute. I couldn't imagine walking around the street with it, and I did wonder what any of my friends would say if they saw Mary, but I was sure she would carry it off with splendid unconcern.

Now that we had moved away, Mary had brought her hands up to explore her shorn scalp. "Oh, excellent!"

I guess she was pleased. The light was starting to fade fast, so Mary walked into the living room to admire herself in the mirror there. She came back out as Ted and I were tidying up the porch. "Oh, this is so excellent. I love it."

She sat on the couch and petted her head while Ted stowed his gear neatly into its trolley and I swept up Mary's hair from the floor. With that in a bag waiting delivery to the compost heap in the morning, I picked up her braid from the table. "What do you want to do with this?"

"That's Ted's souvenir."

I put it aside.

I got the feeling that they were both a little spent now that the haircutting was finally over.

"So, what do you want to do tonight? We could go to the Lakehouse if you wanted casual."

"I'm game for anything you all would like to do, but I wouldn't mind just staying in and hanging out."

I wasn't all that motivated to go out again myself, but I didn't want them to miss any experiences.

"But don't you want to go out and show off your new haircut?"

"We could do that tomorrow, before I leave."

"I vote for that," Ted put in, "I'd love to spend some time people watching, but not tonight."

"But I wouldn't want to put you to the trouble of cooking, it's been a long weekend for you, too. Sandwiches would totally work for me," Mary put in.

Ted and Mary helped me make a platter of sandwiches and we brought that into the TV room with a big bowl of chips, another beer for Ted, a glass of wine for me, and more soda for Mary. I was glad I'd stocked up on that.

We sat watching TV companionably together with Mary sitting on the floor in front of the couch. Periodically one or the other of us would reach out to stroke her head.

It was early when we decided to turn in. This time Mary asked, "so what's the game plan for tomorrow?"

Ted replied, "I was thinking get up late, go to breakfast in town, then we can walk around some, we'll take you to some interesting sights, then back here. We can change and pack and then start driving home."

"Sounds perfect. Casual attire?"

"Weeell, yes, but I was wondering, I don't suppose by any chance you brought a pretty sundress?" I laughed, she'd brought about 4.

"I've probably got something suitable. So, something pretty and feminine?"

"Yes, exactly."

"Ok, see you in the morning."

I think the excitement of the weekend was starting to tire even Ted, because he slept until at least 7:30 on Monday morning. He brought up coffee in a thermal carafe and poured me a cup when I showed signs of rousing. We sat in bed together.

I asked him, "so are you sorry it's over?"

"What do you mean? It's not over. We still have most of today. Don't we?" He looked disturbed as if I, who had been asleep, could know something he didn't know.

"Of course we have today. I just meant are you disappointed that the cutting's over?"

"Oh! Well, no. There's still the showing off and admiring my work to be done. I think she looks really nice, what do you think?"

"I think she looks beautiful. I'd like to see her in the morning light before I decide how much I like this last cut, but since she wanted it all cut off so she'd be ready for her trip, even if it's not the most flattering of the cuts, it's probably the most useful for her."

"Well, exactly, as long as she has enough to cover her scalp when she leaves, the shorter the better," Ted agreed.

"Where were you thinking of going for breakfast?"

"Would you be okay with going into town? I can call and make reservations at that little place with the sidewalk tables."

"Perfect."

"The only thing is, when do you think Mary will be up? If she wants to sleep in, I don't want to rush her, but . . ."

"I heard the shower running a few minutes ago. If you say around 9:00 that'll give us all a chance to get ready."

He went to the phone and made the reservation.

"You don't think she'll forget the sundress do you? I mean, it'd be okay

if she wanted to wear something else, I just thought. . . "

I laughed, Ted obviously had a particular image in mind that he wanted to make real.

"And you, too, of course. Did you pack a pretty sundress?"

"Sure and I'll be happy to put it on for you, but I'm not showing off my daring new haircut."

"You don't need a daring new haircut to show off. You just need to show your beautiful self."

Ted kissed me and started demonstrating that he did indeed consider me desirable.

What with one thing and another, we made it downstairs with only a few minutes to spare if we didn't want to be late for our reservation.

Fortunately, Mary was already downstairs. She had on a lovely sleeveless blue dress, that really drew attention to her curves. She'd accessorized with some dangly bead earrings and a matching necklace, and the flirty way she was walking made me think she was wearing stockings rather than pantyhose under her dress. Her shoes had enough of a heel to be flattering without being unwalkable.

Rather to my surprise, she was wearing more makeup than I'd seen on her before. It wasn't overdone, or too much for the day time, just a different look for her.

Ted looked at her and it was obvious that she'd divined exactly the look he was going for.

We got the the restaurant just exactly on time. There was a pretty big crowd of holiday makers, but our reservation secured us a nice table in the shade.

This wasn't as bohemian a group as there had been where we'd gone for brunch the day before, and, of course, Mary's hair was shorter than it had been.

This time, I did intercept some less than positive looks and I overheard a few people speculating about her sexual orientation, but, overall, most people who looked at her still seemed to think she looked very attractive.

And then there was the man out walking his dog. He actually walked into a street sign he was so busy staring at her. He looked mortified, more by having been seen to have done that than by the collision, so Mary called out to him, "I like your dog!" and he cheered up a bit.

From a people watching point of view this was definitely the most interesting excursion. Watching Ted was pretty interesting, too. He swelled with almost paternal pride whenever anyone was obviously admiring Mary, and he got very defensive when some seemed to be negative.

She smoothed the latter occasions down. She said it didn't bother her if people stared or even if they said something, and she convinced Ted that the only thing that would bother her would be if they undermined his pleasure. So, we focused on the positive attention.

Eventually we'd finished our breakfast. Ted had originally said that he just wanted to go for a stroll, enjoy the weather and the tourists, but when we left he restaurant, he seemed to be steering us away from the tourist locations and towards the business section of town. A pleasant enough walk, but an odd choice.

We walked along shops that were open to entice the holiday shoppers, when Ted said, "lets go in here."

Ted doesn't surprise me very often. So I was doubly surprised when he steered us into a wig shop. As far as I've ever known, Ted likes short hair, not fake hair. The only thing I could think of was maybe that Ted wanted me to get a short haired wig, not to match Mary's cut, I doubted they had anything like that, but at least to be in the same general theme.

My surmise was disproven when Ted started pointing out wigs that weren't all that short. He obviously knew something of the subject, because he talked about the advantages of human hair over synthetics and some other technicalities that I would not have expected him to know.

Mary had the strangest expression on her face

The store owner was most attentive, suggesting that the wigs could be tried on to see how they looked. She obviously thought that Mary had had some misfortune to her hair and that naturally the only decent thing to do was cover it up. Preferably with a very expensive, human hair wig.

Both the store owner and Ted were pressing her to try one on. It was a nice enough blondish shag, I suppose, not a patch on any of the haircuts Mary had had in the time I'd known her, though.

Finally, Mary turned to Ted and said, "but, I'm not ashamed of having short hair. I do have a couple of wigs at home, but they were more to cover the awkward growing it out stage than to wear when my hair was ultra-short."

"I didn't think you'd be ashamed, it's just, well we both heard people say some nasty things, and I wouldn't want you to get harassed or anything."

"I'm used to drawing attention. I really think I look beautiful, and I want to show off. The people who don't like it, well, it'll do them good to have to deal with something unconventional.

"And," she continued, with a sort of meaningful smile, "if at some point I didn't think I looked so beautiful, I have a far more comfortable and practical way to cover up for a few days."

She reached into her purse and pulled out a stretchy, kelly green tube of material. She gave it a complicated twist and then, looking into one of the shop's many mirrors fitted it onto her head, bringing it down a little way over her forehead.

The color was a knockout with her navy dress and a good complement to the warm tan of her skin. It sort of looked like a cross between a pirate's headcovering and a bandanna, and you'd be hard pressed to realize that it hid so little hair.

"Are you sure? I'd be happy to buy you something nice."

At this point, the store owner, scenting an expensive sale hanging in the balance, made her mistake. Mary had pulled off her covering and tucked it back in her purse.

The store owner said, "now, Miss, you should really listen to your elders. You can't go out like that, they'd be embarrassed to be seen with you. Here, we'll get you a nice, long blond wig and you'll see. You don't want people to think you're a boy, do you?"

I'd only ever seen Mary good-natured and easy going, so I was very surprised when she drew herself up with tremendous hauteur. "My dear woman, I do not believe that either of my companions are embarrassed by my appearance. And anyone who is incapable of telling that I am a woman doesn't know enough about women to be worth my attention. Good day."

With that, she swept out of the store.

Ted and I followed her, rather bemused.

"Mary, I'm sorry I didn't mean to suggest that you don't look beautiful, you know I think you do. I just didn't want you to have any bad. . ."

"Oh, I wasn't offended at either of you. It was just that old cat. She makes me want to shave my head bald and show 'em all that I'm still more beautiful than those sour crabbers!"

Ted laughed at her offended indignation, and, after a moment so did we all.

We walked leisurely back to the car. Truthfully, as far as I could tell, most of the people who looked at Mary smiled and seemed to think she looked nice, but there were definitely a few sour crabbers.

When we got in the car, Ted said, "there is one more place I'd like to take you. I discovered it a while ago, and it's a little bit of the land that time forgot."

He'd never mentioned anything like that to me, so I was curious as we got in the car. Ted drove in a direction I didn't usually go until he came to a little town. It wasn't what you'd call a rough neighborhood, but it had a general run down air that suggested the tourist dollars weren't making it all the way here. He parked and led us up a street. I couldn't imagine what he would find interesting in this quiet little backwater, when he lead us up onto a porch.

A porch with a red and white pole by the door.

"Oh, no Ted! You can't ask her to . . .!"

Mary smiled at me. "Actually, Elaine, I think both Ted and I have been expecting that this would be the natural end to this adventure.

"I doubt it'll look good on me, and I'm sure this is the reason for the offer of the wig. But it's something I've never tried, and I would like to experience it at least once.

"The only thing is, Ted, it probably won't look good. Is that going to be sort of a downer note when you're thinking about your mid-century birthday?"

"No, the only thing that would spoil my pleasure would be if you felt like you had to do it."

"Let's go get me smooooth!"

Mary had that look on her face again, the roller coaster look.

I pushed down my own misgivings. And, I reminded myself in a couple of weeks she'd have every bit as much hair as she had now. Realizing that she was going to lose even that in a few minutes, I came to decide that I liked this tight buzz very much indeed.

For her, I mean.

Mary turned back to Ted. "Any back-story? Am I your slutty niece who needs to be punished until she learns to keep her legs closed?"

Ted looked tempted!

"No," he said reluctantly, "the barber might not be willing to do it. Just follow my lead."

He opened the door for us and then went past us to stand at the counter.

The shop wasn't really dusty, it just seemed like it would be dusty. I would have said it had been lifted right out of the past, from an episode of the Andy Griffith show, I think, except for the small display refrigerator off to the side with a collection of soft drinks. There were even a couple of hicks playing checkers towards the back for additional old time atmosphere.

The barber, brushing down a customer in the over-sized chair, was exactly what you'd expect. Late middle-aged, wearing a smock, but not one that a "stylist" would ever be caught dead in.

He turned at the sound of the door opening, the sun was obviously in his eyes as he squinted towards Ted, "I'll be with you in a moment, Sir."

Mary and I waited in the chairs in front of the big plate glass window.

The barber finished with his customer, who went off to join the two men in the back, maybe they were playing parcheesi.

"And what can I do for you, Sir?"

"Do you do head shaves?"

"Yes, if you'll come on back, we'll get you started."

"It's not for me, it's for her."

Ted waved Mary forward. I couldn't see her face, but her head was bent as if she was looking a little down.

I heard the barber draw in his breath and one of the parcheesi players dropped his dice.

The barber looked hesitant for a minute, but as Mary walked forward, she must have come out of the glare so that he could see her, see her hair, because his expression changed to a professional impassiveness.

"Of course. Come back and have a seat, Miss."

He pointed her to an over-sized barber chair. The red leather of the chair made a frame for her navy blue dress. She perched in the front of the chair. Ted stood a little away from and behind the barber, not directly involved, but overseeing.

The barber, just like Julie, except this was nothing like the haircut with Julie, pulled out a piece of tissue paper and held it against the back of her neck with one hand while he pulled the cape snug around her neck with the other.

The barber gestured her to sit all the way back in the chair. Her feet didn't reach the foot rest.

He lightly ran his fingers over her hair. I remembered my own hands caressing that soft covering only last night.

"Did you do this?" He asked Ted.

"Yes, that's the shortest I could get it with what I had."

"You want the works? Hot towel and then lather?"

"Yes, I want it perfectly smooth."

"It'll take a while for that to grow out." There was nothing overt in the barber's voice, but faintly I could hear a note of gloating.

"Good." Ted's voice was perfectly neutral.

"I'll buzz it down to stubble, then I'll shave her bald."

"Good, Ted said again.

"Elaine!" he called out. "Come up here, I want you to see this!"

A part of me profoundly didn't want to watch. But another part did.

Ted looked around. The barber pointed to the next chair in the row.

"There's a good view from right there."

Ted nodded me to the chair. When I was in it, he reached out and gave the chair a quarter spin so I had no choice but to look right at Mary. Over her shoulder, I could see the three men in the back, watching transfixed, their game forgotten.

The barber made some preparations and then walked over to his work counter.

He picked up a large clipper hanging on the wall. All the clippers I'd seen over the weekend had been sleek and aerodynamic looking. These looked very clunky and old-fashioned by comparison.

"Don't get much call to use these babies these days. I got it as army surplus, the same ones they used for doing induction cuts. She'll be looking like a recruit in a few minutes."

He pressed Mary's head firmly down against her chest. From this angle, I couldn't read her expression. She didn't seem to have any expression.

The clippers were loud as they flicked on.

He pressed the blades firmly against the back of her neck and started pushing them up her neck. One long sweep, flick the hair off the blades then down for another.

He started on the side away from me, so I couldn't see the results of his handiwork. Sweep, flick, sweep. Now I could watch the path of the blades pressing up her scalp.

As he pulled the clippers away, I put my hands to my mouth, giving an involuntary gasp. If this wasn't bald now, it was as near as made no difference. The white scalp stood out in stark contrast to the blond hair the remained behind her ear.

And then that was gone, too.

Quickly, he buzzed away the hair on the sides and then he was standing in front of her, removing the last of her hair from the top of her head.

He stepped back.

Mary was bald.

I felt numb.

I mean, from our first conversation, I'd known this was a possibility. Then it had come up again with Ted, and she'd said he could do this to her if he wanted. But, somehow. . . I just never thought.

The barber wiped the loose hair off her head with a towel. "That blond hair comes off a treat. No worry that she'll have a shadow any time soon." He chuckled at his own jest.

He ran his fingers over her head. Mary shuddered at his touch. "Feels strange doesn't it? Well, you might as well get used to it. You're going to be feeling that for a while."

Mary kept her head down.

The barber stepped away and now Ted walked up to feel her head. He ghosted his fingers over her head and Mary gave a little groan.

The parcheesi players had their mouths hanging open.

The barber came up with a steaming hot towel and put a temporary end to the show. He wrapped it around Mary's head. As the towel was pulled snug, Mary made a little noise in the back of her throat.

"Got to get it good and hot. The rest of that pretty blond hair'll come off like butter."

He pressed the towel more firmly against her head and then covered it over with a second towel.

Mary slumped in the chair, closing her eyes and letting out a long, quiet sigh.

The barber took the opportunity to sweep what was left of Mary's hair off the floor and then went back for a quiet exchange with the men in back.

I didn't think they were talking about baseball.

In a few minutes, he came back. He wiggled a finger under Mary's soggy turban and obviously decided that the butter was sufficiently melted. He pulled off the towels and dumped them in a hamper, and went to get a double handful of foam from a dispenser.

"Sit up, I don't want to have to bend over to reach you."

Mary did so, looking enigmatically at her reflection in the mirror, once again she made a little exhalation. The barber raised his foamy hands and started frosting the warm pinkish gold tone of her scalp with the blue tinged white of the foam. He covered her head from maybe a half inch past where I thought the hairline was in front all the way back down to the paper lining at her neck.

"We'll give that a few minutes." He went to rinse off his hands. He picked up his razor - an actual cutthroat razor, I was amazed that they still made them - and began drawing it down against a leather strop.

"Always use a sharp razor, for the closest shave," he said.

"Well, little lady, are you ready to be bald?"

I was starting not to like him very much.

He didn't wait for a reply. I doubt he expected a reply. From her.

He looked up and Ted and Ted nodded fractionally back.

This time, he started at the front, scraping away the foam and whatever hair was under the foam an inch at a time.

It was a slow process, and it could have been boring, scrape, scrape, clean the blade of foam, scrape, scrape, but I felt mesmerized. A part of me wanted desperately for it to be over so we could get out of there and a part of me wanted it never to end.

As with the clippers, I couldn't really see what he was going and then suddenly I could. Without even the faint covering of hair she had had before, the white of her scalp was in marked contrast to her tan face.

I knew that when the foam was all gone, her scalp would blaze white against her tan.

Scrape, scrape. Whatever she had left on the nape of her neck after yesterday was gone.

Once again, the barber ran his fingers over her scalp. Where he found a rough spot, he went back and scraped it smooth.

Finally, he seemed satisfied. He put his razor on the counter, and started wiping his hands on a towel. He gestured for Ted to inspect his work.

Ted took his time, stroking his hands in all directions, sensitive for any remaining hair. He pointed out a few places and the barber attended to them.

When they were both satisfied, the barber wiped away a few stray bits of foam, and then buffed Mary's head smooth.

He turned to Ted with a smile, and said, "a nice, bracing aftershave?"

"Not this time."

The barber unfastened the cape, spilling the last of Mary's hair on the floor. He pulled away the paper which had stuck to her neck. "And there you are, as bald as a baby's bottom!"

Mary looked up, almost looking at Ted. "May I go wait outside now, . . . please?"

He nodded.

She had to struggle a little to get to the end of the chair and then discreetly smooth her skirt down as she got to her feet.

She walked by me, towards the door. Every one of us turned to watch her. Out of nowhere came a memory of this morning when I had surmised she was wearing stockings under her dress.

She walked with her head down.

The slump of her shoulders acknowledged that her hair, one of the most profound symbols of a woman's beauty, had been completely stripped from her and was lost to her for months, maybe years.

The movement of her hips, balancing on those just slightly high heels added,

And I can still make you want to fuck me!

Any man who didn't have raging hard-on at that point needed to have a quick word with Bob Dole.

The barber turned to me, all of a sudden his smile seemed positively malevolent. "So, are you next?"

Ted stepped forward. "Not today."

With his body hiding the gesture, he slipped something, a smallish tube of some kind, into my hand. I palmed it.

Ted stepped back, "Elaine, take Mary and wait by the car."

I nodded, and headed towards the door. I couldn't manage Mary's

layered body language, but at least I kept from scuttling to safety.

I found Mary waiting on the porch.

She was quiet, and seemed almost stunned. I would have expected her to be exploring this new tactile sensation, but she just stood there.

Feeling protective, I took her arm and started walking her to the car. We were maybe 50 yards from the barbershop when we came to a little park, set back from the street, out of sight of the barbershop. There was a park bench and the obligatory war memorial.

"Do you mind if we sit down for a minute?"

I was happy to do so and happier that she seemed to be coming out of the ether. We sat on the bench and now Mary started running her hand over her head, almost ruefully assessing the situation.

I looked at the tube in my hand. 'DomeScreen - Sunblock Especially Formulated for Shaved or Bald Heads.'

Mary laughed gently. "I'm gonna need that until my scalp builds up some exposure."

She held out her hand for the tube, but I said, "no, let me," and squeezed some into my palm. She leaned her head down so I could reach.

I felt hesitant. How do you touch someone's, another woman's, bald head?

But I reached out and started stroking it onto her scalp. Tentative at first, I realized that the warm smoothness of her head felt nice under my hands.

It was like touching a baby. Babies are awfully nice to caress.

She gave another little groan.

"Is that a good 'unnnhhh' or a bad, 'oh, no, I think I'm allergic, 'unnnhhh'?"

She twisted her head so I could get the back.

"A profoundly good 'unnnhh.' I could put my head on your lap and go right to sleep."

Her actions contradicting her words, she pulled a tissue out of her purse for me to wipe my hands and straightened up.

"Ted's on his way out."

I continued working the sunblock into her scalp until I was sure every bit of the newly exposed skin was covered. Only then did I take the tissue and turn to face Ted.

Normally I can read Ted like a large print book, but there was too much going on with his face for me to identify anything except a lurking uncertainty.

I hadn't been sure of what I was going to say to him, or even what I thought, but that worry put it all out of my mind.

I stood up and walked towards him. When he came in range, I reached out to give him a hug and he enfolded me in his arms.

Partly, I felt like he wanted the reassurance of my body held tight to his and partly I felt like his penis wanted to bore through his khakis, through my skirt and just take me right there.

For one, mad moment, I looked around for a secluded spot. Mary would understand. But it was not to be. If this one horse town had a make out spot, this park was not it.

I moved to disentangle myself, but Ted still held me tight. "Elaine, I'm sorry. I didn't mean. . . I'm sorry, I know that whole scene must have seemed really appalling to you. But, when he turned to you, I never would have let . . . "

"It's ok, I did know it was just a game. I knew you wouldn't. . . "

Ted looked down, a troubled honesty in his face.

"No, I wouldn't. But, Elaine, when he turned to you, I did, I wanted it. I wanted it to be you in that chair."

He turned his face away from me. I reached up my hand to his face,

"I know. In a way, I wanted it too, I wanted to feel those clippers rumbling up my neck. . . . . I'm just not. . . "

It seemed like only seconds later when I heard Mary ask plaintively, of the sky, I suppose, "They're kissing again. Is this going to be a kissing book?"

Ted and I unwrapped ourselves from each other. "You'd rather the rodents of unusual size?"

"They're a myth," I supplied. It's nice being with people who get the same cultural references.

Now Ted turned the uncertain look to Mary. "You ok?"

"Yeah, I'd be happier if I had someone here to smash faces with, but other than that, pretty content.

"I've always wanted to play the naughty girl who gets sent to the barber's chair and leaves it a girl gone bad.

"So, did the conflicting signals walk work, or did I just look like I had back problems?" she asked cheerfully.

"At least one of the Darryls had to retire to the back room to wipe off his jeans," Ted reported. "And I think your friendly neighborhood barber, well I wouldn't be surprised if his hand is too cramped to hold a razor tomorrow."

Mary dug in her purse and pulled out a pair of sunglasses. She flipped them open and slipped them on.

No, I didn't like bald. The skin was too white, and even her little shell like ears stuck out with no hair around them, and you really shouldn't be able to see the bone structure in a person's head, and. . . .

Oh, God, did she look cool.

She stood up. Did I mention how cool she looked? Stylish shoes, hose, that navy dress just skimming her knees and giving her breasts a much closer hug, the earrings, the sunglasses, her tan, the makeup, more than she usually wore, and then that amazingly white head. Her whole appearance was a study in contrasts.

"I'm thirsty. Do you think there's someplace over there that would be open and have sodas?" She pointed to the far side of the barber shop.

Ted must have been quicker on the uptake than I was, because he immediately took her hand in his and said, "let's find out."

Ted and I strolled. Mary proceeded in what was just barely shy of being a catwalk strut.

There weren't just sodas. There was an ice cream stand.

I could see Mary glancing down at her navy dress and doing a quick probability calculation before ordering the banana cone. I tucked her bottled water and a large wodge of napkins in my purse (well, it's hard to look sexy when you're trying to hold too many things) and we promenaded back towards the car.

I'm reasonably sure it was the other Darryl who had to rinse out his jeans this time.

Mary managed to hold off dripping her ice cream on her dress until we were all back at the car.

"Home, James."

Ted's little head had apparently, finally, figured out that it wasn't going to see any immediate action because he was able to sit down in the driver's seat without spraining anything.

Ted barely had the car pulled into the street when Mary scooted forward on the seat so her head was between us, and said, "so, tell!"

"Tell what?" Ted responded.

"Well, what happened after we left? You gave the guy some cash, he said 'have a nice day', and you walked out?

"Oh that! Are you sure you really want to hear it?"

Both Mary and I gave him looks that made it clear we did want to hear it.

Ted's not much of a story-teller, but he's an accurate reporter of facts.

"Okay, well, first, when you left, the barber asked Elaine if she was next. You should have seen the look on your face, . . . " he turned to me. "She was being a good sport, but I thought she'd probably had enough, so I asked her to go wait with you.

"Once the wimminfolk were gone, the drooling section came over. One of them asked, 'so, what'd she do?' but the barber gave him a look and he backed off a bit. I just said, 'family problems', kind of short. . ."

"So, they all think I'm knocked up?" Mary seemed rather amused at the thought.

"Well, . . . yeah."

"Then what?"

"Then the barber said, 'we'll this'll sort her out, really give her something to think about. That was a good call, making her dress up pretty like that. Really drive the lesson home. Pretty clothes and jewelry don't mean much on a woman who's bald.

" 'If you decide you want to keep her shaved for a while, it'd probably be enough to bring her in every four weeks, or once a month.'

"At that point, the idiot twin interjected, 'oh, man, I'd sure love to see her with that bald head and a big belly!' The barber just gave him a look, but I think he was taken with the idea as well. He said, 'well, if you decide you want to keep her shaved, I can give you a discount.'

"I said that wouldn't be necessary, in a month we'd be sending you away. Everyone agreed it was more decent that way.

"But, I think they were disappointed that there wouldn't be any more head shaves, because the other guy said, 'you must not have been very happy with your wife, letting that happen.'

"I just looked stern, and said, 'I don't think I'll have any more problems with either of them, for quite some time.' Then I paid him and left.

"I gave him a fair tip, though." Ted looked apologetic, as if that had been somehow inappropriate.

Mary put in, consideringly, "I think that's right. The tip's for being a very good barber, which he is, not for being a misogynistic, bullying asshole, which he is, too."

"Anyway," she continued, "to be honest I had more fun being shaved and then later acting the pricktease, with him being the misogynistic, bullying asshole, than I would have if we'd just gone to Supercuts and I'd had my head scraped by a hispanic lady who only wanted to get done and get home."

I wasn't exactly willing to admit that the experience had been fun, but, she had a point.

Back home, I set up the tripod so that I could get some pictures of us all together. I knew Ted would treasure the picture of the two of them standing casually together while Mary made inroads on the ice cream cone. But, I wanted one that I could frame and include with the pictures of family and friends we had on the occasional tables at home.

Mary and I went to her room to pack up her stuff. She skinned out of her dress and rolled it up inside out in a corner of the suitcase. I'd been right, stockings and a garter belt to match her lacy bra and panties.

"Not very practical," she commented, "but I figured it'd help me really get into the part." She undid the garter belt and slipped the stockings down her leg, tossing it all into her suitcase. On went a pair of jeans and a polo shirt.

As her head poked through the collar, she reached up to give it a rub. "That's gonna take some getting used to."

"Will you be okay? I mean I know your hair'll grow back in a few weeks, but . . . "

"Oh, yeah. I'll probably pull on the buff, that's the name of those bandannas, when I get on the road, but that's more to limit my sun exposure. Even with the sunblock I'm still getting some sun, and I don't want to get home and have a sunburned noggin.

"But, when I get home, . . . that's what I love about living in a city, you can do whatever you want and no one really cares. Besides, I'm starting to think I can really rock this look. You might see me in the style section next Sunday. Chic dress, cool shades, sleek head."

She laughed. But, looking at her, I didn't think it was so absurd as I would have this morning.

As she packed, we talked about some of the high points of the weekend, giggling like old friends.

Ted came in to take her suitcase out to the car and I made a quick stop in our bedroom.

They were chatting together as I came out. I went up to her and gave her a hug, then slipped a piece of paper in her hand. Then it was Ted's turn. He held her against him, stroking his hand over her head and down her neck. She pulled his head down closer to hers and whispered something in his ear.

He looked down at her, obviously puzzled and she grinned back up at him, "you'll find out."

We made our final goodbyes and she was neatly turning her car around and heading back down the driveway.

I was expecting we'd just putter about for a while, maybe get caught up on email or something, but that last embrace had obviously brought memories of today's adventures rushing back, because Ted was in no mood to sit down and read email.

Somehow, as he ran his fingers through my shoulder length bob and up the back of my head I found myself matching his enthusiasm.

On Tuesday morning, we drove back home in our own private convoy. The traffic was light and we were driving through the outskirts of town by early afternoon. A store window caught my eye and I phoned Ted to tell him I was stopping to do an errand and I'd meet him at home.

When I was pulling into the driveway, I saw Meghan's car. I'd asked her to stop by and feed the cats, and told her I wasn't sure how late we would be getting in today.

As I walked by Ted's car, I saw that he'd brought our suitcases in, but left the haircutting trolley on its side in the back of his car.

I greeted Meghan and we chatted. She was mostly caught up in her plans for the birthday gala she was planning. That prompted her to ask, "hey, when are we celebrating Dad's birthday anyway?"

"We already did. This weekend. Your mother and I had a lovely trip to the cabin. We went out for dinner and to see some sights, and a friend of your mother's came out and we took her to the club one night. It was very pleasant."

"Dad, this is your fiftieth birthday! There should be crowds of friends, and balloons and speeches and cake! Not a boring old weekend at the cabin."

Ted folded her in a half-hug and said, "honestly, sweetie, when you get to our age, a nice quiet weekend seems a whole lot better than all that commotion and fuss. Your mother planned this weekend perfectly and I couldn't be happier. I just don't know how she's going to top it when I turn sixty."

Meghan grudgingly accepted his assurances. I was tempted to point that there was nothing 'our age' about our age, but decided that that was just a little misdirection on Ted's part.

"Well, if that's your idea of a good time, what are you going to do for Mom's birthday, go out for a rousing game of shuffleboard?

"It's funny you should mention that. I was just thinking a nice, three month cruise would be nice."

"What? Mom, you've never wanted to go on a cruise, and three months on a boat, you'd be bored out of your minds."

"You don't spend the three months on the boat, you sail to an interesting spot, then you spend a week or so exploring there, and then on to your next destination. It's like doing a world tour but without the airlines losing your luggage."

Meghan was plainly unconvinced, but she had to go back to her own home to start calling caterers.

As she pulled out of the driveway, Ted said, "If you want a cruise, you know I'd be happy to take you on one. But, three months, isn't that a bit long?"

"Well if Mary's right and you'd think she'd know, hair grows about a half inch a month. At the end of the cruise it'd be about the length of that nice cut Mary had when we went out to the club."

Ted just stared at me.

"But," I continued, "if you didn't think that cut would be flattering on me, I could try something else. . . "

More staring.

"Or, I could just leave it like this, but that'd be boring."

"Elaine, are you serious? Do you really mean you'd let me . . . I mean you'd be okay with getting your hair cut shorter?"

"What I want for my birthday is I want you to do whatever you want with my hair, but just give me a little time afterwards to grow it back to a respectable length."

"And you think an inch and a half would be a respectable length?"

"Yeah, I don't know how well I'd like it, but I could definitely wear my hair in that style without feeling embarrassed."

"Can we leave tomorrow?"

"No, silly, we can't go before Ariel's birthday party next month. And we still have to pick a cruise. I stopped at a travel agent on the way home and got a few brochures."

"You're really serious?"

"I wouldn't suggest it if I didn't mean it."

"Did you tell Mary you were going to do this?"

"No, I was going to ask her for some advice after I talked to you. Why?"

"It's just that she already gave me some advice.

"When she was getting ready to leave, she whispered in my ear, 'with virgins, the most important thing is just relax and take your time.' I had no idea what she could possibly be talking about."

"It's good advice. You want to help me pick the cruise?"

"You pick the cruise, I'll plan the haircuts."

"Deal."

And that's why I like shopping on line.

The End

 

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