HairSnip.com

All characters are owned by their respective owners. This is a fan-based parody

 “This looks like the place," Wonder Woman thought to herself as she flew down to an old abandoned warehouse.

 She had been on the hunt for a new super villain for a least a month now. The criminal had stolen a large amount of tech the company of which insisted that it was important enough to retrieve, and secret enough not to tell her about. The anonymous tip she received a few hours ago about the warehouse was pretty vague, but it was the only thing she had to go on. As she opened the corroded door she noticed it was already unlocked. Scanning the room she could see some light coming from a small office on the second floor.

 “Hello is there anyone here?" she yelled her voice reverberating through the emptiness.

 “Surprisingly late Wonder Woman thought you would react to my “anonymous" tip quicker than that."

 “Show yourself now!"

 “Oh don’t worry Wonder Woman you’ll see me soon enough all you have to do is take a deep breath."A noxious green gas started to fill they room.

 “Alright stay calm it’s just sleeping gas" thinking to herself. “All you have to do is contact the other… superheroes  ...before you fall asleep..."

 “I see you’re woken Wonder Woman." 

 The room she was in was littered with computers and machines. However what grabbed her attention was that she tied by her own unbreakable lasso of truth to a barber chair, and that her captor was wearing a barber’s jacket.

 “So it seems you have a theme not a very good theme, but original however."

 “Ah yes let me explain."

 “Well I suppose I have some time before I escape and capture you."

 Ignoring her comment he began."I used to be the security chief at the company which asked you to find these machines. However they never told me of the research they were doing, but I was always curious. One day while I was at a bar I noticed a drunken scientist who I had seen often at the company. He told me that he had created a subliminal mind control device. The company decided it was to be destroyed reasoning it was dangerous, and ironically thought a super villain would try to steal it. I knew everything about the building every little fault of that building it was easy to steal it. Now the second part of my master plan is you.

 “So I suppose this the part where you turn me into a mindless slave don’t worry the Justice league has plans in case of mind control you’ll be captured in seconds." She frantically yelled.

 “Oh no my plan is a bit more subtle, and you can call me Baldur," Announcing as he took out a large pair of black clippers.

 Wasting no time he grabbed Wonder Woman’s hair. Pulling her head forward and bringing the machine to the center of her forehead. She felt the vibrations going from the front to the back of her head, and soon moving down her neck. He stopped for a moment only so he could take a few pictures, and making sure his video camera was positioned properly. After that he brought out a mirror in a crude attempt to break her will. Trying her best not to give him the satisfaction she tried to hide her anger and sadness of losing her once beautiful raven colored hair, with only a stripe of stubble running down the middle of her scalp remained. Shoving her head down again, he took another pass with the clippers across her hair. After a few more passes he forced her head up to take another look. She no longer had any hair from the front, top, or back of her scalp. He pulled hard on the remaining hair on the left side bringing the right side up. Running the clippers slowly across the right side of her scalp, then he carefully brought the clipper around right ear. The only hair left on her scalp is on the left side. Grabbing her left cheek he held her head steady. He repeated the process on the left side of her head. Leaving only the lock behind her left ear, but the clippers shaves this as well. She looked at her head; all of her hair is gone. He turned off his clippers, and she took a deep breath.

 “Finished, Baldur" Wonder Woman spoke for the first time in which felt like hours.

 “Hardly Amazon"

 Her body froze. With his hand he was holding a can of shaving cream. She couldn’t believe it this man was obsessed with making her completely devoid of any hair.

 He gathered a white cloud of foam in his hand, and began spreading it quickly across her scalp. After finishing he took a straight razor out of his pocket he seized her head still. He proceeded to scrape off the stubble from her head with short skillful passes. Her head became smoother and smoother as the razor revealed the naked skin on her crown. He finished, and started to run his fingers across the now naked scalp checking for any stubble as did so. Finally with a huge smile he wiped off any leftover foam from my head. He grabbed a bottle from a nearby desk.

 “This will get rid of that shadow," rubbing a generous amount of the chemical on her head. He then positioned the mirror so that she could see her whole reflection.

 Wonder Woman gasped. She looked like an alien, as though a single strand of hair had never grown on her scalp. Taking another look at her now porcelain head she noted her very feminine neck and cheekbones. She took a little solace in the fact no one could possibly confuse her for a man.

 “Eyeing yourself I see," Baldur said not even attempting to hide his joy.

 “Baldur, you have accomplished nothing, if anything you helped me assert my own natural beauty."

 “Good, because the next part of my plan involves you helping your coworkers find their natural beauty."

 Wonder Woman felt her heart skip a beat. “What the hell do you mean!"

 Baldur turned on one of the machines he stole, and then picked up a pair of headphones placing them on Wonder Woman. He then plugged in microphone into a computer, and began speaking in to it.

 “Testing Wonder Woman I will release you from the lasso of truth, and you will stand perfectly still."

 Trying her best to ignore those orders, and just punch him in the face her body forced her to comply.

 “Good, Now Wonder Woman I want you to enjoy the freedom and beauty of a shaved head, so that you will keep it shaved."

 Thoughts came rushing into her head. “Maybe I should keep shaving my head it not like that I look ugly. In fact I feel more empowered if anything."

 “Also I want you to try and convince your fellow super heroines to shave their own heads."

 “Supergirl is always complaining about her hair, and she has great facial features. Maybe I should ask Batgirl her hair must get in to her eyes when she’s patrolling Gotham." Thinking Wonder Woman not even wondering where all these foreign thoughts were coming from."

 “Sometimes however those heroines turn out to be it stubborn if they refuse your offer, I want you to bring them here so I can help them."

 “Oh wait what if they really don’t want to shave their heads. They would never experience the clippers passing through their hair, or the razor scrapping of stubble. Wait, the Baldur could her help all she had to do was bring them to the old warehouse."

 “If anyone asks about what happened here tell them the tip turned out to be a dead end, but you found me later which resulted in me hitting you with a beam that turned you bald. After which I barely escaped. Now that my cover story is intact in your memories I want you to return to the Justice League."

 Without a word Wonder Woman opened a window and flew out her head shinning.

 “Looks like the world is going to experience something new." 

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